Babylonian Rebirth
by Svenja The Strange
Summary: A very, very old aquaintance of Bills helps him to a new life with Sookie. Set after the events of Season 3. Slightly AU.
1. The Possibility

**Note:** I started watching "True Blood" recently and love the show! I've only seen the first three seasons so far but really love Sookie and Bill together (although he seems to be lying to her all the time... ). I wish they could end up together and live (well, exist) happily ever after. So this is set at the end of season three in a slightly AU where Russell and Eric have died in the sunlight and for once there is no one out to get Sookie for being so "special".

**Disclaimer**: None of the characters belong to me. I'd like to add Bill to my collection of extremely cool fictional characters I'd just love to own, though. I think he's pretty great.

Please be nice since English is not my first language and this is my first TrueBloodFiction.

**BABYLONIAN REBIRTH**

**Chapter One:** The Possibility

The warm night air hit me like a solid brick wall of heat as I stepped out of the air conditioned rooms of the quiet, cozy little restaurant Bill had taken me to on this brilliant, starlit night, the first together again in peace since that fateful night of the proposal, which had changed so much. It still frightened me to think of the days that had followed.

Though it had been a very pleasant evening, I felt relieved that it was drawing to an end. When Bill had asked me out last night, I had felt a sudden pang of panic, thinking that he might consider proposing again, reminding me of the fact that I had never given him an answer to the question he had popped on that night, which felt so long ago to me now. He had never learned the answer I had decided to give him that day and though my feelings and wished concerning him had not changed a bit, after all the terrible things that had happened since then, the thought of marrying him was somehow confusing and unsettling. The fact was, I simply wasn't sure any more. I still loved him deeply and earnestly, but even though the incident in the back of the van was forgiven, forgetting seemed a lot less easy. From the way he was treating me, I guessed Bill was sensing it and it was making him terribly sad and so he did his best to earn back my trust in his self-control when it came to his most primal urges. He had no bitten me again – well, except during our passionate make up sex the night Russell had tried to break into my house but we both had been wild with a desperate desire to be with each other again - and he was "dieting", as I he liked to call it, by exclusively consuming "True Blood".

As we walked though the nearly empty parking lot over to his car, I couldn't resist the urge to take his cool, big hand into mine and I could see from the corner of my eye how the small, but tender gesture made the corner of his beautiful, chiseled mouth twitch into a wry smile. It made me notice how rarely he had done that lately. I hoped the underlying tension and disquiet that had crept into our relationship would soon dissolve. We had talked things out. Bill had apologized again and again, I had forgiven him and it had been easy to do so, once I had noticed how badly I missed him when we were apart. I had realized – how corny I thought it sounded even in my head – that I could not live without Bill Compton. And I didn't want to, as it was. Eric and Russell were dead, no deadly catastrophes, no serial killers, no kidnapping had been going on in the last few weeks and I was expecting to go back to feeling safe and comfortable with Bill again. Then again, had I ever felt like that with him?

Bill must have sensed the gloomy direction my thoughts were taking, because he broke the quaint silence of the warm night.

"Thank you very much. This has been a wonderful evening." His voice was deep and quiet as ever.

"It's me who has to say thanks. The food was good, pity you couldn't try it." I answered in a light tone, thankful that he had interrupted my train of thoughts before I had the chance to start brooding.

"That dessert did look quite delicious, to the best of my knowledge. And it smelled good, too."

Before I could finish the thought of never having caramel ice cream with Bill on the porch on a hot afternoon, the soft pressure of his hand brought our slow stroll over the graveled parking lot to a halt. I hadn't even noticed we were already at the car. But Bill didn't seem to want to get in yet because when I turned to face him, he was looking down on our entwined fingers, seeming a little flustered.

"Sookie, there's something I wanted to talk to you about…"

Oh boy, here it came! My hearted skipped at least two beats when he looked up to meet my eyes and his gaze went from tender to worried.

"Are you alright? You look pale."

Now was the time to get it out before anyone's feeling could get hurt.

"Ok, look. It's just, after all that has happened since the night you… well, you know. I had been wearing your ring all the time. I was going to say yes, but so many things happened."

He looked positively horrified at that, his bright blue eyes filled with hurt and remorse. I could have sworn his face had even less color than usual.

"Oh, I didn't mean it like that. I mean, I still love you, you know I do and I want to be with you, it's just that at the moment I can't…"

I trailed off helplessly lost in the attempt to voicing my own confused feelings. Thankfully, Bill saved me by speaking again.

"Sookie, I know. It's too soon and I wasn't going to pressure you about it. There is all the time in the world to talk about this when you feel more comfortable."

He managed a small smile, but I could see that didn't reach up to his eyes. I thought he looked hurt, but he gained control over his features within seconds and gave me an abashed grin instead. It was funny how sometimes this superhuman vampire version of a man could look so sheepishly human.

"Actually, I wanted to talk about something else. I have some kind of surprise for you." He rubbed his neck in a gesture of embarrassment as a small pause ensued. Damn, the man knew how to arouse my curiosity.

"It's something I've been… well, working on, you could say, ever since our relationship started to get serious. Please, hear me out and don't be mad that I haven't told you about it before. It's something that I thought only a legend among Vampires and I never thought it even possible that it might be true. But I did some research in the library and on the internet…"

I felt silly for still being surprised to hear that Bill was using the modern methods everyone else used.

"Ok, you're starting to make me nervous. What are you talking about?"

Bill made a noise that I would have described as a deep breath had I not known better. I could tell from the way his handsome, slightly glowing features were frozen in his usual solemn expression that he too was nervous ad uptight and it wasn't actually helping me with the attempt to acquire any kind of peace of mind. What was he going to tell me? Hell, if there was going to be danger ahead _again_ I wasn't sure I wanted to know about it. After everything that had happened since we had met and after all the times I had nearly been killed, I had come to the realization that being with Bill meant being in serious - deadly serious – trouble most of the time. There had been times I had though I wouldn't be able to deal with it, but the few days of thinking we had separated for good had brought me to the realization that there was nothing in the world, that could frighten or hurt me more, than to live my life without William Compton. The force of this feeling gave me strength and I told myself I would be able to face whatever horrible thing would be coming for my life or his existence this time, so I followed him in silence when, instead of getting in the car, he tilted his head slightly into the direction of a narrow path leading in the woods.

"Walk with me?"

This time it was him who reached for my hand and pressed it tightly, as we walked into the dark shadows of the trees. With him I was never afraid in the dark, but I made sure I was as close to him as possible. Ever since the breakup my desire to touch him had grown almost morbidly strong.

"Sookie, I have been thinking." It sounded like he had trouble finding the right words. "The way your life has changed ever since I stepped into it… It is dangerous and unhealthy. I have caused you so much pain in the past when all I ever wished to do was to protect you."

I felt my insides grow cold. What was going on? Was he breaking up with me again? As if this could mend anything, I tightened my grip on his hand, but he spoke on.

"Vampires are dangerous creatures. We have a fierce and ferocious nature and although you know I try to suppress as much of it as possible, I cannot act entirely human. I will always be a threat to you; my _kind_ will always be a threat to you."

This. Did. Not. Sound. Good. _At. All_.

"Bill. I…"

"No, please. Hear me out. You cannot deny that I have made your life a nightmare full of killers, werewolves and vampires seeking your blood."

I wanted to tell him that it was not his fault that I was a fairy and that there were vampires out there lusting for my blood. It was not his fault that Rene had hated women who socialized with vampires, but I knew he wouldn't hear any of it. Bill could be terribly stubborn.

"Some time ago I was foolish enough to propose to you, although I knew deep down that I could never give you the life you deserved. Besides all the danger and violence you have endured because of me, there are other things I selfishly refused to consider when I asked you to be my wife."

Ok, I was seriously freaking out now and almost sure where this was going. He had taken me out on a nice date tonight to dump me as gently as possible. I could feel hot tears welling up in my burning eyes and a violent sob choking me, as I tried to interrupt him again. We were standing in the dark and I could barely see his lightly glowing face in the gloom of the woods, so I could not quite make out the expression on his face as he continued.

"Please, darling. Don't cry." He sounded soothing and a little surprised."I should have started this differently." He muttered to himself, as though he was angry with the result of his little speech. "Before you start crying, please hear what I have to say to the end! When I last proposed to you, I hadn't been able to give you what you deserve. As it is, we would never be able to have children, never be able to lead a normal life and have breakfast on the lawn on Sundays. But I want this life for you, Sookie. I want this life for _us_!"

He sounded desperate now, and when I felt him move, he put his cold hand on both sides of my face, cupping my cheeks that were wet with tears. I felt sad and desperate, but the confusion about why the hell he was telling me all these painful things I knew so well already. Why was he voicing this hopeless, hopeless wish that would never come true?

"Why are you saying all this?" I asked him, my voice breaking at the effort not to let the sobs take over the control over my throat.

"Because as long as I am a vampire, however much we may deny it, we both know deep down that we can never be truly happy together."

His voice was raspy and thin now too. His face was close to mine and I breathed in the intoxicatingly manly smell of his body. I had stopped wondering how a dead man could smell so nice a long time ago.

"As a vampire, I can never make you happy. So I will have to change what I am."

"W-what do you mean?"

"Sookie, I may have found a way to cure the virus, lift the curse to … be reborn. Call it as you will, but I think I the accounts are true, that I might have found a way to become human again!"


	2. The Considerations

**Note: **After I've finally been able to go on a short holiday trip, I'm back on my desk and Chapter two is up. Hope y'all enjoy. Thanks for all the nice reviews that motivate me to continue!

**Chapter Two: **The Considerations

All the way home, I felt a strong mixture of confusion, great happiness and horrible fear. The vampire I loved so badly and I was considering of marrying despite the fact that I had though a normal life with him could never be possible, had just introduced the fact that in the end it might be possible after all.

"And you've been thinking about this ever since we got together?" I asked for about the fifth time in the past twenty minutes. "If you knew there was this possibility, why haven't you told me before?"

Bill, with his superhuman sense only glancing on the road casually every now and then whilst driving, gave a sound that displayed the first signs of exasperation.

"Well, as I told you. I used to think it was only a legend, but when I started to dig deeper into the matter and research some literature on it, I began to think that maybe there might be something to it. I'm still not entirely sure if it is possible and from what I've heard it could be very dangerous."

"From what you've _heard_?" It sounded like he had even spoken to someone about this.

"Yes, well. I told you I had some kind of surprise for you. I invited an old friend…a very, very old friend I met in the nineteen twenties. I contacted her as soon as I found out more about the … method used to perform the transformation. She too wishes to undergo the procedure."

"And she knows how to do it?" I asked, suddenly excited. All the talk about it being potentially dangerous that had dulled the pure joy I had experienced once Bill had told me there was even the slightest chance we might live happily ever after was forgotten for an instant. Only now, that the finality of the impossible had made room for the tiniest glimmer of hope on the dark horizon that had deemed me our relationship lately, the realization of how badly I wanted this hit me. I wanted Bill, and I wanted all of him every day and most of all every time of the day. If this woman knew how to turn Bill back into a living, breathing, mortal man… I tried desperately and absolutely in vain not to get my expectations up too much. She certainly wasn't going to do this tonight, or was she?

"Sookie." Bills dark, sonorous voice woke me from my reverie. He sounded slightly worried. "Before you meet my friend and before we go any further in this matter, I need you to think about if you really want this."

I gaped. "How could I not want this? Unless you don't…"

"Oh, no. I do. I do want this, very much. It's just…." Again he suddenly seemed shy and nervous, as though there was some aspect to the subject he hadn't told me about yet and he felt terribly uncomfortable to talk about. I was just about to tell him to spit it the fudge out, when a slight notion crept into my mind. Was my beautiful, charmingly dangerous, manly and gentlemanly vampire feeling a little self-conscious about becoming human? I was absolutely sure it weren't the announced dangers of the procedure that were troubling his mind, but maybe he was having doubts about swapping all the bad and uncontrollable fits of bloodlust but also all the superhuman speed and strength against a beautiful, normal and quiet life but also against all the weaknesses of a mortal, human body. Was he afraid that he might not be able to protect me should there be another vampire craving my fairy blood out there? I decided to just ask him about it and the way his chest imitated the movement and sound of heaving a heavy sigh told me I had hit home. The fear that he might change his mind about trying a transformation tightened painfully around my heart. I had to convince him we would be alright.

"Bill, with Eric, Russel and the Magister gone, there should be no one out there who knows my secret. Of course we can never know for sure, but don't you think that once you can pull yourself out of the vampire society once and for all it will be much less likely that some other crazy, bloodthirsty creature will notice me?"

I could tell that he wasn't convinced, but he gave me a small smile. I touched the cool back of his large hand that was lying unmoving on the gear shift.

"This is the one chance we have. I love you, Bill, and I will stay with you whatever existence you choose to lead, but if we are ever going to live in peace, this is our one shot at achieving that!"

The tender, insistent tone of my voice finally seemed to ease some of his qualms, but I was sure there was still something else on his mind.

"There would be other changes besides the loss of my vampire strength and speed." He spoke in his usual slow and quiet way, but the fact that the things he was about to say was deeply troubling to him was showing.

"I would be a normal man, with a normal body temperature, with normal complexion. I would have to shave and eat and… use the bathroom. The sex would be like with a normal man too."

I could have started crying with anger and relief at the same time. Here he was, letting me sit and ponder about why on earth he wouldn't want to get what we had dreamed of ever since our relationship turned into something serious, and he was worrying that I might be disappointed in having regular, human sex with him?

"Do you really think me that shallow?" I did not mind a bit how he flinched in surprise, when I positively bawled at him.

"No, Sookie." His voice was soothing and apologetic. "No. I know you're not. Just think about it. You can't deny that my being a vampire was part of the attraction, part of what drew you to me. If I go through with the transformation, given that it will work, I will be a man just as any other." This just made me angry again.

"You'll never be like any other…"

"You would probably be able to read my thoughts."

This knocked the air out of all the points I had been planning to make. In my delusional happiness about what had become possible that I had thought utterly impossible, I had forgotten that particular and not entirely irrelevant fact. What if I would be able to read Bills mind? I couldn't deny that the peace and quiet I experienced around him had added a rather big part to my falling in love with him in the first place. Would it change my feelings if I would have to keep up my mental walls around him too for the rest of my life? Would I start to withdraw from him once I could hear whatever was going on in his head? Would I be unable to relax in his presence the way I had been able to do it until now? The questions raced in my mind and cast a dark and dampening shadow over the bright light of my joy. I noticed Bill looking at me from the drivers' seat with a sad and troubled expression. My long silence seemed to hurt him and suddenly I felt angry with him for spoiling my happiness by bringing up this horrible, horrible idea. Although I didn't feel sure about my feelings at all, I responded to his silent gaze out of mere mulishness and defiance.

"We don't know that for sure. Besides, it won't matter to me. Until now I have loved every part of you, even all the dangerous vampire stuff. By now, I think, there can be nothing in your head that's worse than nearly killing me by sucking me dry or getting me in deadly danger every time one of your vampire buddies comes to town."

It wasn't even a lie. At this exact moment, that was what I really felt. But would I still feel this way once confronted with a human Bill an all his human thoughts? I pushed the doubts away as far as I could and reminded myself of how often I had lain in my bed fantasizing about a normal and quiet life with Bill. Imagining how our children would look – in my mind we had a boy and a girl, the girl pretty and blond, the boy handsome and dark haired with bright blue eyes. I felt embarrassed by this girlish little dream of a perfect family – how it would feel to take a long walk in the bright evening sun, how Bills hair might look in the golden light of a late afternoon. Hell, why was I worrying about the few things that might change for the worse when there was the possibility of so many things changing for the better? The happy feeling returned to my body in form of a burning hot desire to touch Bill and find his flesh soft and _warm_.

Just when I thought about how much I yearned to meet this person he had mentioned, who was going to help us with whatever magic was required to bring a vampire back to life, I noticed we were already back in Bon Temps and on the direct way to the old Compton house. Maybe my remark about "sucking me dry" had brought up to many remorseful thoughts or maybe Bill was lost in his own contemplations concerning our future, but he had replied nothing to my last remark. He drove in solemn silence, looking like the perfect stone effigy of a man driving a car. It wasn't until he pulled over on the lawn in front of his house and saw the dim light shining from behind the curtains of his living room that he spoke again.

"Anna is already there." He turned to look at me, a sad but tender smile playing around his lips. "I believed myself beyond the ability to hope for many decades, but then I met you. You cannot know how much I _hope _that she'll be able to help us."

It was such a sudden and passionate outburst of his feelings, that I didn't resist the urge to pull him into a long, ardent kiss until my breathing grew irregular and his fangs appeared retracting his thin, delicious upper lip slightly over his teeth. The deep, smoldering look we shared when he broke the contact of lips, was a silent agreement that this would _definitely_ go on later. For now he just brushed away a strand of blond hair that had come loose from my pony tail and let his hand brush over my cheek lightly.

"I love you." His voice was deep and sonorous and thick with desire. I answered that with another short peck on the lips and then we quickly got out of the car. As Bill opened the big, old door to his house, my heart was racing wildly. The dream I had dreamed all the time I had been together with Bill was feeling so close to touch, that I almost imagine to feel Bills hot breath on my neck, as he entered the house close behind me.


	3. The Decision

**Note**: That's it with Chapter three. Since I study the cultures and languages of Ancient Mesopotamia and Egypt at the university I'm not making any of the referred to names, languages, places etc. up. What you're reading is real Sumerian or Akkadian. Just for those of you, who are interested…

**Chapter Three**: The Decision

As we entered the familiar hall of Bills aged mansion, the only source of light poured in from a small lamp in the living room to our right and cast long, still shadows on the darkly patterned carpet. I felt giddy and anxious to meet this woman after Bill had given me some short information about who she was in the car. He had told me that they had met in the late nineteen twenties, a while after Bill had decided to leave his maker Loreena, and was struggling with his decision to restrain his primal vampire urges and to bring as little harm to humans as possible for him. She had helped him with that, being much, much older than him and they had become quiet close. Of course, with a pang of jealousy I had assumed they had been lovers right away, but when Bill had laughed his deep, rumbling laugh at that, I had felt relieved (and a little scathed because of him laughing at me.) He had told me again she was very, very old. Older than any vampire he had met, older even than Eric or Russel or Godric. From what she had told Bill about her past, she had been made vampire about four thousand years ago. And in fact, as soon as I had entered the house, I imagined I could feel an ancient presence looming in the darkness of the corners, surrounding me and filling my heart with a vague and nameless sorrow.

Bills cool hand on my naked shoulder ushered me into the living room. I couldn't see her at first in the dim, sparse light of the small lamp, lighting only a small radius andilluminating the couch and the carpet directly around it, leaving most of the room in a warm twilight.

"Hello Anna." It wasn't until the quiet greeting Bill said into the seemingly empty room, that I noticed a shadow moving in the corner of my eye.

"Bill." The response came in the soft, clear voice of a young woman and in the blink of an eye she was standing there in the middle of the room.

She looked young, petite and fragile. From what I estimated she couldn't have been older than me when she was turned, maybe two or three years younger. Her body was dainty and I was sure if she would have stepped up in front of me, the top of her head wouldn't quite have reached up to the tip of my nose. She was so extremely pale, that it startled me slightly to see a pair of huge, dark eyes rimmed thickly by long, black lashes staring out at me with what looked to me like reserved interest. Her hair was also very dark and smooth and dangled in a ponytail all the way down to her hip. I couldn't help but remember the jealousy I had felt earlier when I had assumed that her and Bill had been lovers. She was extremely beautiful. However, it surprised me to see that she was not dressed like most of the female vampires I had met, who always seemed to display an obvious interest in fashion and had mostly been dressed in exclusive designer outfits and very feminine or sexy attire. The vampire Bill had called Anna was wearing sneakers, dark slim pants and a deep red T-Shirt, looking, at least when it came to her clothes, like any college student in America might have looked.

"You must be Sookie."

She stated in her clear, girlish voice and the next moment found her small white hand shaking mine politely. She greeted Bill in a more intimate fashion as she reached up to throw her slender arms around his neck and pull him into a tight embrace for which he had to bow down several inches.

"Yes, I am Sookie Stackhouse. Nice to meet you!" I blabbered out nervously, partly because I wanted the ravishing beauty before me to stop hugging my boyfriend, partly because I had no idea what to say to this woman that was probably able to change my life forever.

"It is very nice to meet you too. Ever since Bill contacted me and told me about you I was interested to meet you." She smiled a small, likeable smile but her words sounded rehearsed and wooden.

Bill however smiled one of his rare bright smiles as he said:

"It is good to see you. Have a seat, I'll be right back." And he vanished into the general direction of the kitchen at human speed, as I noticed. It was his discreet way of giving us some time to get to know each other.

"I am sorry, but I haven't spoken to anyone for over a decade." She said as if she was the one who could read minds.

"A _decade_? What have you been _doing_?"

I could tell she was amused but didn't laugh at me.

"I've been keeping to myself, mostly."

The strange tone in which she said that made me uneasy so I tried a new subject after a small uncomfortable pause.

"So… Anna. That's a nice name. Doesn't seem very exotic or old, though. You vampires keep disappointing me with your names." Woops. That sounded rude and I bit my lip. She just smiled sadly.

"That's because it's a short form. My full name is ḫedu-ana. It means "adornment of the god An". It's sumerian." She stated it as though it was the most normal name in the world. "Sookie is a nice name too. Very unusual." Her smile, though still sad, was open and honest and I couldn't help but think that I started to like her.

"Sumerian?" I had never ever heard of whatever that was.

"It is one of the languages that were spoken in Ancient Mesopotamia the time I was made vampire, in 2278 BC, as you would count it. It hasn't been spoken for over three thousand years, I think."

That left me speechless. Bill had told me his friend was old, but the actual number was not easy to take in. The thought came to me that it must be hard living in a world that was so far away in time from your own, that there was no living person who could speak your native language. A wave of pity hit me, as I noticed how sad and tired those huge, dark eyes looked when she spoke about it. Besides Godric I had never met a vampire who seemed to feel so repentant to be alive, or well, existent. I had to think of Eric and how, despite being an untrustworthy asshole, full of vibrant energy and the will to go on he had been. This being in front of me had nothing of that. I wondered if this was bound to happen if you walked the earth too long. I wondered if Bill had ever felt like this. Just at that, he stuck his handsome head around the doorframe and smiled mildly into the room. His look towards me asked _And how are you two girls getting along? _As though we had been chatting about nail polish and hair styles. He handed me a glass of water and Anna a bottle of True Blood, then we all sat. The sorrowful silence she seemed to radiate kept me from sitting next to Anna on the couch, so I sat down on the armrest of the chair Bill had seated himself on and leaned against his shoulder in desperate need of physical contact to a person I loved. The presence of a being so full of old regret and darkness seemed to suck all happiness out of my body.

"I am happy for the two of you." Again this gloomy smile, though I believed she meant what she said. "That's why I answered to your call in the first place." This was addressed to Bill, who turned to me to explain.

"As Anna has told you, she became a vampire over four thousand years ago when the great kingdom of Akkad ruled the South of Mesopotamia, whose ruins now lie under the sands of modern Iraq. Now, the legend of a procedure that could turn a vampire back into a human being is very old and well known among vampires, but no one ever believed it could be true. As I looked deeper into the matter, I found that the legend had its roots in sources found by archeologist in Iraq in the eighteen fifties. These sources are tablets of clay written on in cuneiform, the writing that was used in Ancient Mesopotamia and they date back to the Old Babylonian Period."

"I have heard of Babylon!" I exclaimed, happy to finally hear a name I understood. This was very much to take in at once.

"Yes, but we are not talking about the Babylon mentioned in the bible. Let's say that the bible didn't get that quite right." Anna interrupted with a small smirk.

"We are talking of the ancient realm of Babylonia that had its prime around the seventeenth century BC. This was more than five hundred years after Anna had lived in the city of Akkade." O.K., this was starting to confuse me, but Bill had no mercy on my frying brains.

"However, the cuneiform sources had texts in the akkadian language on it that spoke of mysterious rituals that were used to make the gods look favorable on a person or drive a demon from a humans' body. When I read about all that, I immediately thought of Anna and contacted her to find out more."

"It was only when I learned the reason of Bills wish to become human again, that I decided to help." She interrupted him. Despite all the new information floating around in my brain, I vaguely wondered why she wouldn't have wanted to help before. Maybe, like Godric, she was at a point in her existence where only few things could really make her still care. Maybe one of these few things was love. It was a comforting thought.

"So, I went back to the place I was born and raised, back to the place that has been nothing but dust and sand and the memory of the shadow of a kingdom for thousands of years and I searched for weeks and months. But one night, I finally found someone who was capable of reading the old writing, translating the old incantations and rituals and most important, someone who was still capable of bringing forth their ancient magic. A babylonian witch with the knowledge of the ancient days."

A small shiver crawled down my spine, as I imagined a soft, cool breeze creeping in through the window left ajar behind me. Her words seemed so unreal, yet I had to remind myself of what kind of world I had stumbled into ever since I had met Bill. This was not a single bit crazier than Viking-vampires, Maenads, Fairies and Shape Shifters. The picture of an old, hunchbacked woman crouching over a fire in a cave in the middle of the iraqi desert that had crept into my mind freaked me out though. From Bills silence and solemn expression I gathered that this was the first time he heard about this as well, an assumption that was affirmed by the question he posed then.

"Does this mean we will have to travel to Iraq?"

"If you really want to go through with this, yes."

"I do. I'll take care of the necessary preparations and book two flights first thing tomorrow." His tone was deep and determined.

"Three." I stated in a voice which I hoped would leave no room for discussion.

"Sookie…" obviously I had to work on that voice.

"No. Bill, no. I'm coming. You're doing this for me and I'm not going to let you go through it alone."

His bright blue eyes pierced mine with a pleading gaze but grew soft again soon as he realized I wouldn't yield.

"You do know that the ritual is very, very dangerous. There is a chance that the vampire undergoing it will get lost in the grey world between life and death, that he will come back entirely changed from the person he was before or not come back at all." The dim light of the lamp next to the couch cast a dark shadow over her face but her eyes glinted in the twilight.

"You should better be sure about this."

Again it was me who Bill turned to look at. My heart was filled with a boundless, stinging fear to lose him for good in the desperate attempt to gain a life with him. My dream about a normal life suddenly felt shallow and selfish. Was I really ready to put at stake everything we already had to gain something more?

But as he turned back to Anna with a grim nod, I realized the decision had been taken from me. It was his to make and he made it with unshaken determination.

"We'll leave as soon as possible."


	4. The Journey

**Note**: Thanks to all of you who have been reading this far. I promise there will be a little less talking and a little more action soon. Thanks a lot also for those of you who have been reviewing! I'm always excited to read your opinions!

**Chapter Four: **The Journey

Leaning against Bills broad, cool shoulder, I drifted into an uneasy, troubled sleep about three or four in the morning, forgetting for a few moments all the anxiety, the anticipation, the exhaustion and the slight carsickness I had been feeling ever since the old Toyota Pick Up had started barreling over the stony, sandy hills of the southwestern border area of Iran. It was only the second night of driving, but to me it felt like it had been ages when we had seen the last traces of any kind of living civilization. After the night in Bills house when we had met up with Anna, Bill had taken very quick but careful actions to make sure we would be able to leave as soon as possible. He had booked three flights at the special vampire air line to a small airport in a town in Iran, relatively near to the Iraqi border. With the political situation in the Near East it would be easier and safer to get into Iran than into Iraq and we had planned to continue by car, crossing the border on some secret, hidden road at night time. Anna had made arrangements and hired a human guide, Farid, she promised to be trustworthy and capable of bringing us through the troubled crisis areas fairly unnoticed. He spoke good English, though with a thick Arabian accent, and seemed nice enough, but I felt much safer in the car at night, when Bill and Anna crawled out of their travelling coffins we had stored on the loading area of the Toyota and covered with a blanket. During the past day I had wondered if the vampires too had trouble sleeping when their coffins were bumping and jolting over stones on the rough grounds of this country, but I hadn't asked. Instead I used the precious nighttimes to sit close to Bill, snuggling up against his arm in the car seat and watching the breathtakingly clear sky that showed, unpolluted by the neon lights of big cities, so much more bright and shiny stars. Also the moon seemed bigger and more glowing, which made the really unpleasant drive almost romantic at times.

"How much further do we have to drive?" I murmured sleepily after being awakened by a particularly bumpy piece of road. I was surprised there were roads here at all. Only twice had we met people here, both times small groups of armed men wearing caftans and bandanas and weaving around with large machine guns. The first group had actually been rather nice, from what I could make out from my place in the car, where Farid had advised me to stay with a dark headscarf wrapped around my head and pulled into my face. They had talked animatedly and though I hadn't been able to understand a word, it hadn't sounded aggressive or dangerous at all. Farid had even taken a photo with them and received several kisses when they said goodbye. The second group had been much less cooperative. After mustering each one of us darkly, they had refused to let us pass any further and had demanded to see what was in the coffins on the truck. Luckily, we had met them at night, and as soon as the situation had started to get precarious, Anna had given the most impressing display of how glamuoring worked I had ever seen. Within seconds she had managed to make the entire group of men hand over their weapons, let us pass peacefully and forget all about us the second our truck had vanished from their sight. I just hoped if we would meet anyone else on our way, it would be at night.

"We're past the worst. Anna says in the course of the next day we'll reach the place."

I sat up and tried a more comfortable position for my stiff legs that were crouched between boxes of food supplies and cans of fuel. In the front, Farid was jabbering away noisily in Arabic while Anna was listening politely with a wry smirk. Our driver was a scrawny man maybe in his early thirties, with messy black curls and beard and an unhealthy consumption patter when it came to cigarettes. He was always cheerful and talked a lot but I had noticed how he cunningly evaded answering to any kind of personal question concerning what his job was or where he came from. From what I had gathered he was married, but that didn't stop him from eying my blond hair and fair skin with obvious enthusiasm. For Anna however, it seemed he had developed a regular crush.

"Hmmm." The animated talk in the front gave me the possibility to snuggle up closer to Bill and plant a secretive kiss on his neck. He gave a soft and deep growl.

"You're going to have to stop that." He mumbled throatily. It had been days since we had had the possibility to, well, be intimate and as much as I missed it, I guessed for him and his supernatural vampire carvings it must be even harder.

"Next time we're alone you'll have to be gentle with me. I'll not be as resilient as I used to." The playful tone of his voice mixed with the glint in his eye and that adorable playful grin spread a warm feeling in my body. Everything had been going so fast since the day he had revealed to me, that there might be a way for him to become human again. With all the worries, there had been little time to dream.

"I can't promise you I'll be able to consider that."

He gave me a small pinch in the side and I giggled, letting my imagination take over my mind for the first time in days.

"What's the first thing you'd like to do as a mortal man?" I asked him, courteously pushing aside the urge to bombard him with all the things I was looking forward of doing with him. The sound he made in response came very near to a sigh.

"I haven't thought about it yet. I haven't dared to think about it. I think…" he trailed. A small smiled appeared in his lips.

"Actually I don't really care as long as you are there. I want to see your hair in the sun and feel the warmth on my skin. I want to mow the lawn on Sunday while you cook dinner. I want to taste food, real food again. Eat pecan pie and … I want to go to sleep next to you and wake up at dawn next to you again. I want to feel the blood pumping through my veins. I want to watch the sunrise with you…"

His voice had been growing quieter and quieter until it broke of completely. He looked embarrassed, which stunned me a little. Could it really be that after all we had been through my strong and confident Bill Compton was feeling ashamed for these very human desires? He must have noticed my strange look, because the next thing he said was:

"I feel like one of those women in a romantic comedy with Hugh Grant." The comment took all the embarrassment out of the situation and I had to laugh. Bill loved going to the movies, but mushy romantic comedies that reeked of assembly-band productions he loathed. I decided to help him feel comfortable talking about his wishes for the future even farther.

"You know what I want? But beware, because this is embarrassing too – I want to hear your heartbeat in your chest and I want to know what you smell like when you sweat. I want to know what it feels like when we…" I blushed a deep red, when the voice of Farid interrupted me.

"Little love birds back to earth please…"

That was another thing. I wanted to see those pale cheeks blush as well.

"It's almost dawn. The bats have go sleep in their caves." He grinned at us with a cigarette between his shiny white teeth and pointed into the direction where the horizon had started to adopt the faintest little shimmer of a paler blue. We all got out of the car.

"So, what is going to happen once we get wherever we are supposed to get?" I asked while the men uncovered the coffins on the load area.

"You wait." Anna, who had been standing right next to me only a second ago replied from out of her coffin. "Farid knows where to drive us, but I will have to take it from there. I'm afraid all you can do is to wait until dark."

Bill hugged me tightly then planted a soft, tender goodnight kiss on my lips.

"Until dark."He said and a strong feeling of loneliness surged in my chest as I watched him climb into his coffin. I wondered if this would be the last time I'd ever see him do that. The lock latched with a low click.

"Are you excited?" Farid asked me as we got back into the car. I stretched my legs with a sigh in the more spacious footwell of the passengers' seat.

"Kind of. It makes me nervous though, that I have absolutely no idea what the hell awaits us wherever we are going." This was the smallest of understatements. I was _freaking out_.

"Can I ask something?"

"Yes?"

He shot me a strange look from the corner of his dark eyes. "You love him very much, yes?"

The question seemed strangely out of place. "Yes. Why?"

"Oh, just asking. That's good. Very good." He grinned at me.

We fell silent for a while as I watched the blue, yellow and pink of a beautiful dawn seeping like watercolors over the eastern horizon. We had entered a stonier and rougher landscape now and soon the withered traces of ancient civilizations lying around in the dust everywhere distracted me from my musing about Farids strange interrogation. It was fascinating, even to a person like me who had never taken much delight in history classes back at school, how much of the ancient days seemed to be present still in this country. Every now and then we came past small hills in the otherwise plain landscape and I noticed that especially around these rises the shards of weathered pottery and fragments of clay tablets treasured. I asked Farid about it.

"Oh, they are so called "tells". That means hill. They are the remains of the cities that used to stand here. Some a thousand years ago, some three thousand years ago, some even longer."

"And is there no one to pick up all those remains of pottery? Surely there must be archeologists who are interested in them? Don't they belong in a museum?"

"Archeologists are very interested. But with the political situation there have not been any excavations for years. Besides, these fragments and shards lie around here everywhere. If we would try to put them all into a museum, it would have to be as big as a whole city." He shrugged and barreled on over rough and smooth.

"The place where we are going, is this one of these…ah," tells" as well?"

He smirked at that.

"People have been looking for the place where we are going for decades. To the public the place still rates as lost."

"What is this place?" a shiver crawled up my spine at the thought of spending the night at a place that was officially lost in the desert. This whole country seemed to bear a morbid, bleak beauty. It was breathing ancient history.

"You'll just have to wait and see."

It astonished me that I wasn't feeling afraid to at all to be driving through the desert with a man I hardly knew, to a place that was lost, to meet a witch that could raise the dead when I knew that there were at least ten to twelve more hours to pass until my supernaturally strong boyfriend could rise from his coffin to protect me again. I only felt anxious and excited and horribly afraid of what might happen to Bill if the ritual didn't work.

"Do you know this supposed witch we're looking for?"

"Do _you_ know you're very impatient?"

I made a face and went back to looking out the window, sulking. The more time I spent with him, the more I was beginning to suspect that Anna hadn't merely chosen Farid as a guide for this trip because he was such a gentle and thoughtful driver. It seemed to me that he knew more about the matter than he was letting show, maybe he was even involved. The thought had already come to me the day before when I had noticed a strange reserve to ask questions on his part about what the fudge a blond american girl was doing driving into the middle of a politically precarious area with two vampires in her hand luggage. Also he hadn't denied knowing about the witch. It wasn't exactly helping that whenever I tried to listen in on his thoughts in situations like these, all I could hear was Farids voice singing wired Arabic music irritatingly out of tune. It was like someone had warned him not to think anything he wanted to keep to himself around me. It drove me crazy not to know what was going on.

The day dragged on and the sun was as relentless as the day before. By two in the afternoon I was tired and soaked in sweat and my head itched under the headscarf I had been advised to leave on my head, firstly as protection against the stinging sun, secondly as a precaution for the improbable chance that we might meet someone without noticing him before he saw us. We took a break to eat something and then Farid took a small nap for half an hour. It seemed a miracle to me how this man could still be this fit after two days of driving with only sporadic half-hour-periods of sleep. Maybe the tons of cigarettes he was smoking were keeping him up.

We hadn't been on the road again for more than an hour when we came to a sudden and unspectacular halt in front of a particularly faded example of the aforementioned "tells".

"This is it?"

"Yes, now we wait."

"_This_ is it?" It didn't seem so very magical a place to me. "Looks like a big pile of dust and aged clay."

"Well, because that's what it is." The amused tone of his voice changed into a more serious one and I noticed how thick his accent really was when he pronounced my name.

"Miss Stackhouse, behold before you the glorious and ancient city of Akkade."

**P.S**.: Thanks a lot, kceniya, that I totally forgot to mention why Sookie doesn't simply listen to Farids thoughts to find out why he's acting strange. I added that and updated the story!


	5. The Way Down

**Note**: Thank you very much for your reviews and also for all the nice PM I'm getting. It's great to see that there are so many other Bill-Fans out there. ;-) So, here is Chapter five, which I hope you'll like. Again, I'm not making the words of the ancient languages that are used in this story up. This is actual Akkadian.

**Chapter Five**: The Way Down

Dusk couldn't arrive soon enough. Already the first shades of an inky blue were starting to stretch over the eastern sky and I was pacing up and down restlessly between the car and the little camp Farid had set up next to it. He was sitting leaned back in a camping chair, obviously catching up on sleep with an extinguished cigarette still sticking loosely between his lips, so I seized the opportunity and took a look around the place that had been proclaimed to me to be so special. Farid had told me that this were the ruins of a once great city, the capital of the kingdom of Akkad that had existed in the late 3rd millennium BC. The stretches of time my mind had to deal with lately were still making me slightly dizzy, especially when I thought about the fact that the pretty vampire girl Anna I had come to known as friendly and mild though rather gloomy had been born, raised and become what she was now in the time this unremarkable pile of dust had been the greatest and most glorious city around. Archeologists all over the world were still looking for this place, or so Farid had told me, and though this Tell was marked on the maps and well known, no one had been able to identify it as the lost city of Akkad so far.

"And the few people who know intend to keep it this way." Farid had told me with a strange glint in his eyes. "There's too much magic here that we don't want to get lost between excavation sections and tents full of nosy archeologists."

As I strolled alongside the rise of the former city, I noticed a small worn path leading up on the top and I followed it, climbing over what looked like the remains of walls of clay bricks and over shards and pieces of things that must have belonged to people long dead. I noticed that there were quite a lot fragments of those little clay tablets with the strange writing on it, which looked more like the traces of a small bird that had hopped over the tablet when the clay was still moist, than writing to me. I wondered how anyone could have been able to read this and wished I could too. From the top of the Tell I could see very, very far. Miles and miles there was nothing but plain, stony desert and a sudden feeling of loneliness hit me when I had to think about what Bon Temps would look like in five thousand years. Would someone be standing on the long passed away and forgotten ruins of my home? Another thought hit me. _Would Bill be still there?_ So far in my life, I had met vampires who seemed to think immortality was the best thing that had ever happened to them, but Bill had never stricken me as one of those vampires. I knew he had suffered a great deal at the loss of his family and that it had taken him a long time to be able to move one. Somehow, I realized, I couldn't feel sorry for the fact that he was trying to give up living through eternity for me and the force of how much I wanted this to work, of how much I wanted to grow old with him and of how much the possibility of him living hundreds and thousands of years after I had died filled me with jealousy. Eternity was a long time, surely he would get over me one day and love some other woman. It was a selfish notion not to want this to happen, but being with Bill, falling in love with him so helplessly and hopelessly had made me come to the conclusion that love was not the selfless, self-sacrificing thing people loved to describe in books or movies (that was the kind of way a mother loved her child or a brother her sister). Love could surely made you _act _all selfless, but the feeling itself, the core of true love, was the burning desire to be love back, to possess another persons' heart and mind and soul as I desiredBills. I had heard him say that I was his so very often, I had never realized who badly I wanted him to be _mine_.

The sun was only a small glimmer on the rim of the visible world now and already the starlit night sky had lowered itself over the country like a sheet of deep blue velvet sprinkled with a thousand sparkling diamonds. He would be up soon and then…

"Sookie." I felt his strong arms wrap around my body from behind and for a moment I was silent, overwhelmed by the feeling of his body pressed against mine, filled with all those thoughts and feelings that had been passing though me moments ago. I didn't know how to describe any of it to him, so I turned around to kiss him, hoping the sensation would transfer. His blue eyes were full of love when he looked at me, but we both knew the moment couldn't last.

"Anna and Farid are coming up. We'll have to go and seek the woman who will try to turn me."

"Bill, I'm frightened. What happens if this doesn't work?"

His smile was strong and reassuring.

"Then I'll stay with you until you die old and happy. There will be no life for me after you."

It was a corny line, but to me it meant everything.

"But I don't want it to be that way. And also… Bill, Anna said there is the chance it won't work and you might die. For real, I mean. And…" It was confusing to want this transformation so much and at the same time not wanting him to have to go through it at all.

"Don't worry, Darling. I'll be fine."

"O.k," I wasn't convinced at all but didn't know what else to say. "Just don't… go into the white light." I ended lamely. Bill just chuckled, a low, rumbling sound in his broad chest and the time for doubts was over when the pretty, white face of Anna appeared on the path, Farids messy black curls following close behind. He winked at me and grinned broadly as they passed and Bill and I followed them over the stony path across the Tell. We stopped only a few minutes later on some kind of small even platform where an ancient paving still showed trough the dusty ground and small pieces of brickwork were indicating that this might have been the inside of a building once.

"_Pite_." Anna suddenly said aloud into the silence of the night, her voice thick with some kind of strange, throaty accent. There were several moments of utter quietness and I was just about to whisper into Bills ear the question what exactly we were expecting, when I perceived the faintest rumbling sound from under my feet. There was a shuffling, then a scratching noise coming _out of the earth – _as I realized with a fit of panic – then in the middle of the platform the dust on the floor began to stir and a fragile looking plate of chapped dried clay rose a few inches and was moved aside from underneath, revealing a black, gaping hole in the ground that seemed just big enough to allow it for a person of Bills stature to squeeze through it with some effort. I almost shrieked in surprise. There was nobody visible in there and I couldn't decide which feeling in my chest was stronger, the wonder at how I had just witnessed what could possibly best be described by the word _magic_, or the terror I felt at the prospect of squeezing myself into this little hole with no idea what was waiting at the bottom. At least it didn't look like anybody was about to crawl out. Another feeling was added to my confused inside, when I noticed Farid, who smiled at me reassuringly without the slightest hint of astonishment in his face.

"_Teddi awāt ilī. Alik_." Although I had expected it, it made me a little angry to hear those strange words I did not understand coming from the mouth of the person I had spent two days driving through the desert with. He could have told me he was in this too.

"I'm sorry, Sookie. No one is allowed to know, until they have proven to be friends by speaking the tongue of the old gods. I wasn't allowed to tell you." He said apologetically, taking the meaning of the hurt look I shot him correctly.

"_ḫedu-ana_ has spoken for all of you. You may now enter."

"Why weren't you allowed to tell?" I asked nervously. "What is down there?"

"I'm only the human keeper of a mystic secret." Was all he replied, the he fumbled in his pocket, handed me a flashlight and smiled at me once more. Anna was already sitting on the edge of the hole, lowering her legs, then her upper body into it until slowly her head disappeared.

"Sookie?" Bill, who had been solemn and silent throughout the whole scene, held out a hand.

"You go first. I'll be right behind you."

Bill kept his blue eyes fixed on me all the time, while carefully lowering himself into the opening, barely being able to push his broad shoulders through. Once he had let the grip of the holes edge go, I saw him slide down a well and then hitting the bottom several meters below.

"Come on. I'll catch you." He called up to me.

"Will there be enough room for all of us?" asked Farid, frightened to an extent which made it seem desirable to me to procrastinate my descend into this uninviting pit before me as long as possible. "Will there be air?"

"There will be everything you need."

I sat down on the edge, my legs dangling into the cool opening and with a last look at the man who loved me and was waiting for me at the bottom, I pushed over the rim and let myself fall until I felt Bills strong, tender arms gripping my body and setting me down firmly on solid ground in total darkness. Above me a tiny section of starlit sky was visible, Farids face had disappeared.

Down here the well was only a few inches wider and as I stood there in the darkness, pressed against Bills cool, rock hard body that I knew so well, I felt the pounding of my own heart in my chest and my pulse in my ears.

"We'll have to crawl a few meters." Bill said, his deep usually sonorous voice sounding flat and muffled by the clay walls surrounding us. It gave me the possibility to take another deep breath more freely when I felt Bills flexible, lean body bow down as he got on his hand and knees. Although I had never felt claustrophobic, following the other two crawling through this unknown, narrow tunnel required quite a bit of willpower on my part. It helped only a little that I had a magnificent view on Bills marvelous behind once I had adjusted the flashlight between my teeth so I could shine ahead. After a few moments I felt that breathing grew difficult. The air was cool but thin and it seemed that the walls as well as the ceiling of the tunnel were coming nearer and nearer as far as we crawled. At one moment I had to stop and readjust the flashlight, because fear and pain in my hand and knees brought me to the brink of crying, but when Bill asked me if I was doing alright, I gave what I hoped to be an affirmative groan. Thoughts of stories I had seen on the History Channel crossed my mind about archeologists dying from breathing in poisonous spores that had developed in the depth of Egyptian tombs.

"Can you see the end yet?" I heard Bills voice ask.

"Yes. I think I'm almost through."

In fact, I imagined I could feel a small stir in the air and, crawling further a few inches, breathing got easier again. Then I heard the rustling sound of a person moving and when I tilted my head to the side to shine past Bill, I could vaguely make out Annas feet on the ground in a room that must have been at least high enough to allow it for a person to stand. When it was my turn to crawl out of the tunnel, I saw Bill squatting besides the opening, holding out his hand to help me up and once out I took a deep breath and tried to make out as much around me as possible. The rooms was high enough for even Bill to stand without having to fear bumping his head and it was wide enough so that I didn't feel any walls when I stretched out my arms. What calmed me a lot was the fact that when I shone over the hard, ground, I found it solid and without sudden openings or deep gaping holes for as far as I could see.

"Let me take your hand, I'll lead you through." Bill was beside me taking my arm and we slowly followed Anna into the darkness ahead.

"And you're willing to give up your cool vampire see-in-the-dark-eyes for me. It really must be love." I joked, trying to relieve the unpleasantness of the situation. I felt Bill elbow jerk into my side gently and took the silent meaning. _You know it is_.

"Careful now, there is a narrow door ahead." Anna said from the blackness, and suddenly I gaped with shock. Slowly but surely my eyes were starting to make out her silhouette against a very faint and dim but also very visible and real _glow_. Whatever room lay ahead, I was able to make out the contours of the door that led in it and the thought of someone or something actually being inside this hill of dust lighting the inside frightened me to death. I clung to Bills arm tightly as I asked myself what the hell I had been expecting. Of course there would be someone here, why else would we go through the trouble of climbing down?

"Why is there light in there?" I asked despite what I had just told myself and despite the fact that I guessed for the vampires and their superhuman sight, the difference wouldn't even be visible. The question was met only with silence but I wouldn't have been able to concentrate on listening to the answer anyway because once we had stepped through the doorway, the most incredible and breathtaking sight opened to my eyes, widened in awe. We were standing at the top of broad long stairs, leading down into a hall of such height and vastness, I was sure it took up most of the inside of the Tell I had seen from the outside earlier. Large unadorned columns carried the ceiling, the floor was paved with bricks of dried clay and everything was illuminated by that faint, reddish glow that seemed to ooze from no specific source and made it possible to see all the way over to the far corner of the room. I noticed strange and frightening figures of gold and ivory standing in small alcoves on the broadsides of the room and staring at me quietly from unnaturally large eyes made of dark lazurite and shimmering pearl-shell. Anna followed my horrified gaze.

"Don't be afraid. We are in the great hall of the palace of the great king _šarrum-kîn _and those are the statues of vassals bringing him gifts. You may know the kings name in the adapted form mentioned in the bible. Sargon of Akkad."

"Ah." Was all I could manage in response.

"How is it that the palace is still intact and the ceiling hasn't crumbled?" Bill asked quietly, his voice full of wonder. Anna just turned around and smiled at him blissfully. I had never seen her this happy and confident up until now, as though she was back where she belonged. _Home._

"Magic." She simply answered, her clear voice ringing with joy.

Silently we mounted the stairs that led out of the hall and into another room, much smaller and with benches of clay built alongside the walls. A huge wooden double winged door with golden garrisons in front of us drew all the attention to it.

"You wait here." Anna said, then into the direction of the door. "_anaku ḫedu-ana_." And then the wings slowly, creaky, inch by inch, started to swing open.


	6. The Talk

**Note:** Sorry for not updating sooner, but as much as I'd love to do nothing but write Fiction all day, there are also work related essays and papers waiting to be finished until the end of this semester break. Hope this chapter will compensate! It's extra long. ;-)

**Chapter Six: **The Talk

The dimness and silence around us was beginning to feel so substantial, it was getting hard for me to breathe again as I sat next to Bill in the small antechamber to whatever room Anna had vanished into, clinging to his cool, solid arm and feeling awfully tired and exhausted from the past days and our descend down into the depths of this hidden palace. I desperately struggled to _not _think about how much weight the ruins of clay castles above our heads must put on the ceiling of these rooms and I told myself that the place had been fine the last thousands of years so it seemed very unlikely that they might crumble now. I was tapping my foot nervously into the silence because the deadly stillness made me nervous. Sitting here made me think of being buried alive. No wonder Bill could be so calm and seemingly serene at peace with the whole situation, after all _he _would be used to hanging out in graves, wouldn't he? But that was not entirely true, I realized. From the rigid, upright and entirely unmoved position Bill had been poising in what felt like the past six hours and were, as I realized with about the hundredths glance on my watch in fact only forty five minutes, he too was very strained in expectation. From Anna we hadn't heard anything since she had left through the huge double winged door and not even the faintest hint of sounds had seeped through so both of us were simply clueless as to what was going on.

Despite the strangeness of the whole situation, there was nothing left to say between Bill and me. We had decided to do this, and even if one of us would experience a sudden change of mind at the last moment, I seriously doubted that there would be a way out of it, now that we had gone this far. The impatience in my chest was growing almost unbearably strong and I vented the tension by speaking the first word since Anna had left us.

"What is taking so long? Do you think she's not coming back?" I sighed in exasperation, leaped to my feet and tried, in a merciful moment of fearless impatience, if one of the wings of the large door might open at my push. It didn't move and when Bill spoke to me, I came to my senses and was kind of glad it hadn't.

"She's coming back, I'm sure. I told you Anna wanted the transformation for herself as well. Maybe she's first." His voice sounded calm, but I could sense the anticipation in his words.

"How long do you think we should wait before we get the fuck out of here? If Anna doesn't come back, I mean?" I had trusted the girl because Bill had seemed to trust her utterly and without the shadow of a doubt, but the waiting was starting to really test my patience.

"She is coming back!" Bill answered.

"But how do you know…?"

"No." Bills voice was sharp and excited now, as he jumped to his feet as well and grabbed my arm to pull me away from the door. "She's coming back!"

His superhuman vampire hearing must have picked up some sound behind the door and we both stood tense, staring at the door until, moments later, it started slowly to creak and open. Annas beautifully pale, glowing figure appeared, a mortified expression on her face. I realized her deep, dark eyes were rimmed with red. She had been crying. Before Bill or I could ask her anything, she gained control over herself and put on a reassuring smile. It didn't look like she had been turned into a mortal woman again to me, which disappointed me hugely. Why hadn't she been transformed?

"He's ready to see you now, Bill"

"He?" I blabbered out. "Aren't we supposed to meet a witch of some sorts?" The question seemed pretty out of place and Anna just smiled at me again.

"You can call him what you will. I think there is no expression for what he is in your language. Maybe calling him a "priest" would come closest. But never mind that, it is only important the he can help you! I'm afraid, Sookie, for you there will we some more waiting. He wants to see Bill alone first, but your presence is allowed, required even, once the ritual begins."

_What? _I wanted to protest, but the firm, decisive way Bill took my face into his big, cold hands and pressed a tender kiss on my forehead knocked the air out of every argument I had considered expressing.

"I'll see you soon." He said and I followed him, clinging to his hand, until he squeezed through the small crack in the only partly opened doors and let go of my hand. The doors closed and a hopeless desire to follow him made me grab the door with both hands, when the crack shut quietly behind him. I felt so much like crying, that I had to bite my lip.

"Don't be afraid. He will be fine. I think you will both be fine!" the sadness in her voice reminded me of the expression I had seen on her face earlier and I turned away from the door I couldn't follow Bill though quite yet to sit with her on the bench against the wall again.

"What happened?" I asked quietly, slightly touching her small white hand that rested on the bench beside me.

"I saw the great priest, the En as the native name is, and we spoke about the ritual."

"But… Bill said you wanted to be human again yourself. Why didn't he do it? He's going to, is he?" an unsettling thought had suddenly crossed my mind and I was becoming rather mad at myself for not thinking about it earlier. What if this En-guy wanted some kind of payment for this? Surely he wasn't going to do it for free, that much I had learned about this kind of magical folk since I had met Bill. And why hadn't hethought of this? Or had he? Had Anna and Bill talked about it and just kept whatever the price was from me?

"No, I'm afraid he is not." For a moment she looked like she was going to cry again, but she kept her composure and just smiled the saddest smile I had ever seen. _Forlorn_, I thought.

"Apparently, there are some conditions that I am not able to meet."

"What? What kind of conditions?" I didn't like the sound of this.

"You need not fear for Bill. He can meet all the conditions, I believe. But me… Well, I have been vampire for more than four thousand years now and although I have tried very, very hard to keep as much of my human self in me as possible, I could feel it slipping away with every day, every year and decade and century. There is no hope for me, I'm afraid."

"You mean you're too old?" it sounded flat and stupid and rude to ask this, I noticed as soon as the question had left my mouth.

"I am too old and too lonely. The En needs assistance, a kind of insurance so to speak, that the vampire belongs into the world of the living still, an insurance that a creature like me, born of darkness and violence, deserves the light of live and the freedom of the real death that comes after. You are Bills insurance, I have none."

It calmed some of my qualms and unsettled me slightly at the same time to hear that I was supposed to be some kind of insurance. Would have to take part in the ritual? Would I be able to play the part?

"I could be your insurance as well!" I offered promptly, feeling awfully sorry that this kind and helpful person was not getting her wish granted. Maybe it was the Fairy in me that was feeling the urge to fulfill wishes, I thought oddly incongruously.

"You are a generous person, but that is not how it works, I'm afraid. You love Bill with all your heart. I have been alone too long, there is no one left who feels this way about me."

"I do like you. And so does Bill."

"It's not the same. Not enough."

There was a pause. In wanted to hug her and cry for her, instead I asked:

"And what are you going to do now?" She looked like she didn't know what to answer and I noticed that she never did this thing that Bill did, when he imitated a sighing sound that a human would have made, although he didn't actually need to breathe. So there was another deadly silence, only broken by the sound of my own slightly ragged breathing that was awkwardly noisy in the stillness before she replied.

"I'm going to have to go on existing, I suppose."

"But you want to, don't you?"

"I wanted to feel the blood running through my veins and I wanted to see the sun. I wanted to be who I was, but I think even becoming human couldn't have given that back to me."

There was only little time to ponder the full meaning of her reply because I was torn from my thoughts when, surprisingly swift and wide, the door swung open a third time and Bill stepped out with a broad smile on his face. It took me so much by surprise that I nearly shrieked at the sight of him. I jumped up and threw my arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace.

"What happened?" I asked excitedly.

"We talked. He's ready to begin and he wants to meet you."

Bill took my hand and pulled me through the open door, leaving Anna behind. When I turned back to see if she was following, she was standing with her back to us in the doorway to the great hall we had come through on our way in.

"Isn't Anna coming with us?" I asked surprised.

"I think not." Bills reply sounded sad, but the happy smirk was on his face again moments later. "I'm sure we'll see her again later. I'm going to have to thank her once we're through with this!"

For the first time now, I could see what was behind the doors. It disappointed me a little to find another narrow, dimly lit passageway that seemed to go on forever.

"So he definitely agreed to help us?"

"Yes."

"Just like that?"

"Yes."

"You're usually more the suspicious type, aren't you afraid at all that there's a terrible catch?"

We were coming to a halt in front of a very small opening, covered with some kind of curtain made of reeds. I felt Bills hand on my shoulders and my gaze was drawn irresistibly up to stare into his lovely, deep blue eyes. I knew that glamouring did not work on me, but sometimes the strange, compelling power this man seemed to have over me had me doubt it.

"Sookie." He squeezed my shoulders and smiled at me. "Trust me?"

I nooded weakly.

"Then trust him! You'll understand once you've met him."

I nodded again. The laming fear of what kind of creature awaited me behind the reed curtain crawled back into my body, but I imitated Bills movements, as he released me from his grip and turned to the door. He pushed the curtain aside, and ushered me in, gently, following close behind.

The room was only lit by a small fireplace in the middle. This time I don't even stop to wonder where the air was coming from that fed the fire and kept me breathing. The walls were also hanged with reeds, or maybe even made of them, and in the far side of the room, just outside the small circle lit by the fire, a figure sat upright on some kind of brick stool. I couldn't quite make out his face and before a feeble "hi" could escape from my lips, I heard a low, steady voice, whispering, though loud enough to fill all the room.

"Silima." Then in a very strange accent. "Come. Sit by the fire."

As I drew nearer, my eyes got used to the new lighting and I started to make out details about the person in the seat opposite to us. He was tall and lean, even though he was dressed in a shabby looking furbelow coat, his head seemed to be bald. I could see it shining dimly, reflecting the firelight.

Bill sat on the naked ground next to the fire and I joined him, without taking the eyes of the person still in the shadows.

"Um, I… have a few questions before we start… um, sir." Maybe it was rude to talk without being asked, maybe there was a special protocol to address this En-person, but frequent dealings with magical creatures had kind of made me bold when it came to speaking my mind. It had learned that you really had to make yourself clear with those people, and if there was one thing, I wanted to be clear about, it was that I didn't want to lose Bill, even if that meant he'd have to stay a vampire.

"Sookie." Bill hissed, sounding slightly appalled. When the other guy spoke again, it was louder and clearer.

"Your _aššatum_ is very decided, Bill." He said, sounding neither amused nor very angry, I found it hard to understand him, his accent was very thick.

"_aššatum_?" I whispered to Bill. Instead the other guy answered, standing up from his little stool and slowly walking over to the fire. When he sat down on the ground opposite of us, I could finally see his face. It made me shiver with horror. Apparently this being was a vampire too. He had an extremely, even morbidly thin, paper white face that was completely hairless even to the eyebrows. His lips were so thin and white, he almost looked like he didn't have any and his eyes were merely two shiny, black balls staring out from hollow, darkly shaded sockets. His age was absolutely impossible to determine. He was the creepiest freaking thing I had ever seen and obviously the fact showed on my face.

"I'm am sorry, I must look frightening to you. I was an **en **when I was made vampire and a _kalû_, a lamentation priest, later." He explained kindly. "To be clean for the gods we have to make _gullubu._ That means we have to shave all the hair from our bodies." There was nothing in my head that I could possibly have answered to that. Luckily he continued explaining.

"I also have to apologize for my language. I don't know all the words in your language. I have only just learned it a few hundred years ago and I seldom use it. _aššatum _is… it is the woman who belongs to a man."

"A wife." Bill suggested. For a second I considered protesting, but then I remembered that this creature, this vampire, used to live in a world with a society that must have worked entirely different from ours, so I said nothing. His friendliness and readiness to talk and explain however had made me bold and curious.

"How old are you?"

He thought about that for a moment as though he had to think really hard to recall.

"I was made vampire in the year that Enmerkar was made king of Uruk." He noticed the helpless look on my face and elaborated. "I had been a vampire for almost half a century when your friend _ḫedu-ana_ was created."

"Oh." I said. "Why do you want to help us? Is there something you want in return?"

He made a strange and creepy sound at this. A _laugh, _I realized horrified.

"No. No, there is nothing I want in return, because there is nothing that you could give me."

"Don't you…." I hesitated for a moment when I realized what I was about to ask. "Don't you need blood to survive?"

"I am old, young girl, and just as the humans, the old vampires cannot eat as much as they used to. " His barely existent lips curled back and revealed a pair of still white and sharp fangs, but they retracted again only moments later. "I have not fed in many years and I have no desire to do so again soon. Although you smell good." Again he made the weird chuckling sound, and I felt goose flesh rising on my arms. The guy was giving me the shivers.

"Then why are you doing this?" I still didn't understand. He was beginning to remind me slightly of Godric, though. A creepier, hairless, skinny version of him, but with the same kindness. Anna was like that too.

"Because I can." Was his simple answer. "I have had the power to speak to the gods, to make their statues come alive, to cure diseases, to drive away evil spirits and to calm the angry dead. All this I could do when I was still alive, and my death only increased the magic in me. But as every young vampire, I let myself be overpowered by the darkness when I was turned, and for many centuries I did horrible things. It took me a lot more time than it took your Bill to discover that there was a blackness covering my heart, which was still good in its core. Maybe if I had known someone like you…" he trailed off, obviously lost in his own thoughts for almost a minute and I didn't dare to interrupt his silent reverie. The detached way he spoke of this long past existence, filled me with quiet, respectful awe. Then, very suddenly he began again.

"Once I had woken from my fever dream of viciousness, the only thing I wanted was to atone. And what better way can there be than to give a beautiful girl her lover, so their heart can beat as one?" He smiled at me and for a moment I could almost imagine what he must have looked like five thousand years ago.

"Will it be dangerous?" I asked and felt Bills hand pressing mine.

"Yes. But I am not afraid for your Bill. You are strong. Both of you are."

"Sookie." Bill spoke for the first time. He turned towards me and I felt his hand brush my cheek. I almost lost myself in the beauty of his face and the smell of his body, of which I had been unaware, too lost in the conversation in which he had taken so little part. "I will be alright! I'm not giving up now." I wanted to kiss him so badly it took me a great deal of restraint to force my gaze up again, when the vampire-priest said.

"Good. Let us begin then!"

When he took a bundle of dried leaves from his cloak and threw it into the flames, a sweet, spicy smell rose from the flames and slowly began to fill the room.


	7. The Ritual

**yxNote:** Firstly: Sorry. It's been a while since I've been able to update. Hope you haven't lost interest. Secondly: A big fat thank you to all of you who have been reading this far and honored me with your great reviews! Thanks a lot, they are a big part of what keeps me interested in writing and they also make me happy. I'm not as happy with this on as I wished to be, but I hope you like it anyway.

**Chapter Seven**: The Ritual

The thick heavy smoke curling into the warm air in grotesque arabesques filled my nose, lungs and head and its sweet smell made me feel dizzy and slightly nauseous. For about the fifth time in the past minutes I suppressed a violent fit of cough and tried to keep absolutely still and silent as the En or _kalû_ or whatever I was supposed to call him had told me. Bill was on the ground in front of me with his shirt off, lying in a pool of sweet smelling oil that the priest had poured out over his head, face and upper body after he had dumped the contents of a large silver bowl filled with water over him. Bill was calmly and patiently going through every strange new thing the priest was doing to him without complaint but I was starting to feel slightly ridiculous squatting there in the dark, watching this guy covering my boyfriend in all kinds of strange smelling liquids. He had explained to me earlier that all this was necessary because every item and every person taking part in the ritual had to be clean for the gods, meaning freed entirely from all the kinds of evil that could invade a living being or an object every minute and second of every day. With Bill, he had told us, it was particularly important because if the gods should drive the evil spirits from his body that possessed his soul and made him the vampire he was, first his body needed to be cleaned so he would be fit to be in the presence of the gods. Since I would only be playing a smaller part, it had sufficed to fumigate my body with a bundle of the dried herbs the en had thrown into the fire earlier and to rub of drop of the oil on my forehead, both my temples and wrists. Boy, had I been glad when the creepy, skinny guy had done nothing more than touching these parts with the white, white tip of his bony finger instead of asking me to strip half naked and lie on the floor like Bill. I had still no idea what I would be expected to do and was beginning to feel horribly nervous. From the way Bills hand clutched mine I could tell he too was tense, and had I not known my courageous, brave and rock solid vampire better, I would have guessed from the way his beautiful solemn lips were pressed to a thin line that he was frightened. Not once had he asked the priest what was going to happen to him, not once had he asked how exactly this would work. I could only guess that they had talked about this alone earlier but still I couldn't help but marvel at the way Bill endured this procedure, seemingly without the slightest hint of doubt or mistrust. I looked down on him, taking in – and it came to me that it might well be for the last time - the dim glow of his pale skin in the scarce light of this dark and glum place. His gaze found mine and we looked at each other for seconds, the desire to just pull him up from where he was lying and run for the door building up in my chest. But it was too late for doubts now, and instead I leaned down to kiss his oil covered lips, when I felt a soft pressure against my chest, holding me back. The sudden and close presence of the priest, who had moved over noiselessly, startled me and his touch gave me goose flesh.

"Don't touch." His voice was almost a whisper. "The touch would defile his cleansed body."

I gulped heavily and drew back. Instantly I moved my hand away from where it had held Bills only moments ago. I dared not tell him that we had been holding hands secretly whenever he had turned to get some cultish instrument for the procedure so I kept my mouth shut and so did Bill. We just exchanged another long look and I felt the familiar pressure of a violent sob building up in my chest when I put my hand in my lap and moved away from him several inches. Silence fell again as we waited for the procedure to continue and the priest vanished again in the darkness of a far corner of the room, where I could see him crouching over something soundlessly. By the time he stood before us again, my anticipation was stretched to the point of ripping me apart and I was about to ask if he intended to keep pouring out smelly stuff over us the rest of the night or if would actually start _doing_ anything, when I was surprised by the sudden movement with which he emptied another silver bowl over the smoking fire, which flared up suddenly only just to die down without even a spark left in the fireplace. The room went pitch black.

"_aššab ekleti la namrute aššab ekleti la namrute_." I heard the priests' voice, smooth and cool into the darkness, although I couldn't make out from where it was coming. I felt horribly uncomfortable not being able to see this creepy stranger, who I knew was so much older and therefore faster and stronger than Bill and could rip him apart in a second to be free to suck me dry in another. All I knew about him was what Anna and himself had told me, how did I know this was not a cunning trick and he was using Bill and me as a sacrifice of some sort to undergo the procedure himself? A huge wave of fear crushed over me and I crawled forward a few inches, groping for Bills body in the dark.

"Bill?" I whispered, but I could not hear him answer and I dared not crawl further. Instead of Bills voice, the En spoke again.

"_liltaṣama etamar nūr šamši, liltaṣama etamar nūr šamši._"

Suddenly I could make out a soft moaning sound somewhere in the black before me, a little farther from where Bill had lain down earlier and an unpleasant shock shook my body when I realized that it was his voice, that it was him groaning in pain. I started to crawl forward again, gabbing and groping for Bill in panic now.

"Sookie." I heard him moan, pain obvious in his voice but another voice stopped me dead in my movements.

"_Do. Not. Touch. Him!_" There was nothing of the mildness and friendliness from earlier in these words and I couldn't help but think that I should have known. I should have known not to trust him. He had said it would be dangerous, but I shouldn't have trusted a vampire as old as him. He was hurting Bill and that could not be right, could it? I started to cry then, crouching there on the ground and too much fear and not enough light to get to Bill and to save him from whatever was happening feeling helpless and stupid.

"What are you doing? Are you hurting him?" I cried.

"_alsikunuši ilâni mušiti, iltikunu alsi mušitum_."

My eyes were very slowly getting used to the dark but still I could not see anything that was going on in this utter absence of any kind of light, when suddenly in the far corner of the room, a dim glow rose from the ground and started to gather in several small balls illuminating the room slightly so I could make out Bills body on the ground not far from me. He looked completely lifeless, his eyes open, but staring cold and unmoved at the ceiling of the room.

"Bill?" I sobbed again but there was no sign of consciousness in his features and my gaze was caught again by the moving, glowing shadows that were slowly starting to move and shift, taking the vague and adumbrated forms of people. They were seven, all of them sitting on high pedestals, clad in strange garments and wearing crowns of horns on their heads. I could see that one of them had the features of a woman, most of the others seemed to wear long beards. Cold, silent and unpropitious they sat there and the stillness of their cruel eyes frightened me. The En priest almost looked like he was one of them himself, as I watched him sanding between the unconscious Bill on the ground and the shadowy figures behind him, bare chested now, his hairless, skinny body glowing eerily in the darkness almost like the skeleton of a man.

"_bînu lillianni ša qimmatu šarû_."

Again the strange sound of this long dead language hung in the smoke thickened air that was not stirred by the slightest breeze, when one of the smoke figures, the one sitting in the middle, with a high horn crown, a long gown that left half his chest bare an a long beard slowly rose from his seat under the icy stares of the six others.

"_gišmmaru lipšuranni maḫirat kalû šâru."_

Squinting in the dim glowing light, I could make out the en kneeling down next to Bills lifeless body and raising his arms, holding a thick, pointed stick that he rammed deep into Bills chest before I could realize what he was about to do. When I screamed out at the top of my lungs not a sound broke the silence and when I tried to leap to my feet my body did nothing. I could only feel the hot tears running down my cheeks as I sat there in silent horror and stared at Bills still body, the stake sticking out of his chest. Somewhere in the back of my mind I was wondering why he didn't melt or explode like the staked vampires I had seen before, but it was only a vague thought, lingering behind the pain of seeing the man I loved on the ground like this. The smoke figure that had risen was standing close behind the En now, staring down on Bill with his dead eyes. I could not look away from him either, not even shut my eyes. Even when the En took a long dagger, scarified Bills flat stomach with a swift cut and covered the cut with a bundle of what looked like dried grass I could not take my eyes of this unspeakably cruel and horrid spectacle. I could only watch and cry and suffer.

"_maštakal libbanni ša irṣitim malāta_

_ina maḫrikunu etelil etebib azzaku_."

There was a blinding flash of light when behind the back of the smoke figure beams of sunlight flashed and for a moment he looked almost solid and substantial, like a real being. The light grew brighter.

"_ašib ekleti la namrute, aššab ekleti la namrute_

_ašib ekleti la namrute, aššab ekleti la namrute_

_liltaṣama etamar nūr šamši, liltaṣama etamar nūr šamši_

_liltaṣama etamar nūr šamši, liltaṣama etamar nūr šamši."_

Before the light grew to bright to see, I could make out nothing more than the figure of the bearded man bowing down towards Bills body, then my eyelids grew heavy as if pulled down by some invisible force and I shut them. I could not see for what felt like a long time. Silence fell and I felt like I had lost all sense of time. Somehow I could feel the darkness was around me again and I was alone. The seven figures had disappeared, somehow I knew that, and through all my sadness I wondered if they had been the gods the En had spoken about many times before the ritual had started. I might well have sat there for minutes or hours or days, but somehow some time something brought me back to my senses. It was a sound, like stone rubbing on stone, then the feeling of hot air on my skin and the sound of a light breeze skimming over stony ground. And suddenly I could move again.

When I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was Bill lying before me on the ground. I hardly noticed that we seemed to be in some other part of the Tell than we had been in earlier, a small cave like room with an opening to one side. Sunlight was seeping through this entrance. I crawled over to where Bill was lying, everything that had happened coming back into my mind at once, crashing in on me and brining the tears again. The first thing I noticed was that the injuries the En had inflicted on him were gone without a trace, the second was that there was no smoke rising from his skin although the daylight was, even though weakly, touching the bare skin of his face and upper body. Hope filled my heart with joy, but unfortunately the third thing I noticed was that, when I touched his face, cupped his smooth cheek and softly shook his body to wake him, his skin felt cold. I pressed my ear to his chest and heard… _nothing_. It hadn't worked. The realization was violent and knocked the air out of my lungs. _It hadn't worked_. It was the moment I broke down. After everything we had been though, there was nothing left for to do than to cry. Without holding back, I sobbed and wept hugging the cold and dead body of the man I loved in my arms with only one thought in my head_. It hadn't worked_, _It hadn't worked, it hadn't worked_.

The Translation of the akkadian sentences: (They are taken from three actual akkadian rituals but mixed together to fit my purpose in this story.)

"_The one who dwelled in the dark, where there is no light,_

_The one who dwelled in the dark, where there is no light,_

_He may come out and see the light of the sun,_

_He may come out and see the light of the sun._

_I have called to you, the gods of the night, I have called the night_.

_The tamarisk, whose treetop is high, may cleanse him!_

_The date palm, who catches all the wind, may unfasten him!_

_The maštakal-weed, who fills the earth, may make him shine!_

_Before you he has become bright, become shining and clean._

_The one who dwelled in the dark, where there is no light,_

_The one who dwelled in the dark, where there is no light,_

_He may come out and see the light of the sun,_

_He may come out and see the light of the sun."_


	8. The Rebirth

**Note**: I've been able to update a little faster this time. :-) Again: Thank you very much for reviewing. I'm always very excited to read what you think!

**Chapter Eight**: The Rebirth

I thought I must have cried for hours. When finally I decided I had to pull myself together, my eyes were so swollen, I could hardly keep them open and they burned like hell. My face felt dry and scratchy from the salt of my tears and my body felt so numb and exhausted from all the sobbing, that I thought I wouldn't be able to get up from where I was sitting, holding the lifeless, cold Bill in my arms even if really tried. Even though I did not feel hungry at all, I realized I hadn't eaten in hours and I hadn't slept all night. My common sense was returning slowly and though I still felt like dying from grief any second, I felt that I had cried my eyes dry and that it was time to do something else. After all, I couldn't stay here forever. Rage welled up in my chest, a fierce, furious rage towards the people who had promised to help us and had left us alone without any word of apology or advice. I gently put down Bills still oily head that had been resting in my lap and bowed down to kiss his cold forehead. Lying there, he looked just like he did when resting in his hidey hole for the day, he had been dead before, for all that. The break of physical contact was so hard, I almost didn't manage it, but finally I got up and went over to the wall of the cave, looking for any kind of sign where we might have come through but there was no passage, no door, not even a crack in the smooth, brown stone. Despite the fact that I knew no one would heard me, I started to slam my fists against the wall, screaming at the En to open up, screaming for help then switching to all the insults and slanders in my vocabulary until my already strained voice failed and my fists started to bleed. _No one will open_, I knew. _No one is listening_. I left the small cave through the opening, shielding my hurting eyes against the bright sun that was already hanging rather low over the horizon. Either the ritual had taken up a whole night and the first half of the day or I had been sitting and crying in the cave for a long time, but from the sunset I guessed that it had to be about afternoon. Since I had used up what was left of my voice for repeatedly calling the En priest decidedly unholy names, the cry for Farid came out as not much more than a feeble squeal. Had he left us too? Had he known what would happen? Maybe Anna had held some secret grudge against Bill and they had been in this together? But why go through so much trouble? I decided that maybe Farid was still waiting with the car where we had arrived yesterday and I was just on the other side of the Tell and that maybe I should walk around the hill and see if I could find him. The thought of leaving Bill alone seemed unbearable, though. If Farid was there, wouldn't he have heard me screaming earlier? No, I was on my own, I realized. I went back into the cave, and stood there, for a moment just looking at the man I loved so much.

"I'm sorry!" I whispered to him. "I'm so sorry. You did this just for me." Before fresh tears could start to roll down my cheeks, I made a decision. There was no way I was getting any help escaping this place and there was no way I was leaving Bill behind. A vision of his body, swollen and purple and rotting alone in this crummy place flashed through my head and almost made me throw up. I was still feeling sick, when I knelt down by his head, pushed my arms under his shoulders and lifted his upper body with all my strength. I was not going to leave him here. I was not. Even if it meant dragging him all the way through the desert, even if it meant I wasn't going to make it myself.

He was very heavy and I was already covered in sweat, my arms hurting, terribly thirsty and out of breath once I had dragged him out of the cave and into full sunlight. At least this part had worked. For a moment, I sat sown on my knees, watching his wonderfully handsome face in full sunlight like I had dreamed to do only hours ago. Had I known the price, I might not have wished it so much. Then again, I had known the price. I had known this scenario was a valid possibility. We had both known. But had I really expected it? I didn't think I had, though I had feared it, I had been sure we would be alright, he would be alright. After all, I had been told I would play a part in the ritual and I would not let anything happen to him. It came to me that how things had gone I hadn't taken a part in the ritual at all. At no point had my assistance seemed required. Or should I have known when to step in myself? Should I have known the right thing to do and the right moment to do it without being told? Maybe everything was my fault and I had failed Bill. Maybe the gods had decided that I hadn't loved him enough, or he didn't love me enough to live. It was a thought that seemed ridiculous to me the moment it crossed my mind. Maybe it had been our holding hands when we were not supposed to touch. Maybe, maybe.

In the bright, cruel light of the sun his dark brown hair showed a red and gold shimmer that I had never been able to see in the light of candles or lamps. I gently stroked his pale cheek, brown from the dust now and wondered if these fine, beautiful lines around his eyes had always been there. How much I had wished to see them deepen and multiply throughout a life of smiling. But these thoughts and wished were idle now, I reminded myself once more and with that I got to my feet again and, heaving Bill u, continued dragging him away from the Tell into no particular direction. I had no idea where I was going. Earlier I had considered looking for the tracks of the car and taking that direction to take the way back we had come, but then I had thought of the fact that we hadn't come across any inhabited village on the drive here and there was certainly no way I would be able to drag Bill all the way back to the Iranian border without food, water or something to cover my head from the burning sun. Considering that, pretty much every direction had seemed fine, as long as it meant getting away from this cursed place that had brought me no luck, only death. Maybe someone would find us and bring us to a city maybe they would just kill us. _Me_, I thought. _There is only me_. But somehow my heart refused to give up Bill. It wasn't that I didn't know he was dead, but I wasn't ready to let go of him entirely either, and at the moment I didn't care at all if this was a normal or healthy reaction to the death of a loved person.

The sun was already touching the horizon when the Tell vanished from my sight somewhere far behind us. By now I was going so slow, I was hardly making any progress at all and I was beginning to feel my body functions abandoning me. There was no way I could get much further tonight, so I decided I might as well find some place to rest. When I put Bill down on the earth it felt like the weight of a truck had been lifted off my shoulders and when I turned around I noticed that in the wasteland of this desert there was no place where you could escape the traces of history, What lay close behind me was not exactly one of the hills I had come to known as Tells. It was much flatter and smaller and less impressive, yet it seemed like a good place to spend the night, if, in my situation, something like a good place existed. By the time I had managed to reach the place, the sun was no more than a small silver line on the edge of the world and once I had put down Bills body, I sat down and leaned on the side of this small hill to rest for a moment, trying to forget the horrible aching in my back and the stiffness in my feet and fingers. I wouldn't be able to keep this up much longer but I had to. Even though the thought came to me how horribly macabre I must look, dirty and sweaty and tired, dragging the dusty body of man behind me through a desert, at least there was no one around to watch. I laughed at the mental picture of myself, exhausted and joyless and my laughing turned to crying at some point.

Just when I was pondering the fact that it would be absolutely impossible here to find wood for a fire, something strange shook me from my thoughts. It wasn't a noise or a movement or even a breeze in the air. It was a _presence_. An ancient presence that felt strangely familiar and forced my tired eyes open. The En was standing right in front of me. Quite a few uncivil words flashed through my jaded mind but instead of making me stronger the little rest had knocked even the last bit of strength out of my body, so I just stared at him trough burning eyes full of dried tears.

"It didn't work." I managed to say. It was a weak whisper, yet I hoped it would transport all the anger and hate and reproach I was feeling for him this moment.

"No it didn't." he replied, and then did something I thought was horribly cruel with the thin line of his mouth. He bared his big, white teeth in a smile. "Because we are not finished yet."

I couldn't believe what I had just heard, so I just kept on staring. The En must have noticed my confusion, because he drew closer to where I was lying with slow steps as my hand reached out for Bill and found his cold arm, instinctively clutching it as hard as I could. Maybe he remembered what it was like to be a weak human, maybe I looked as crappy as I was feeling, but he seemed to understand that elaboration concerning his remark was in order.

"Sookie." I couldn't remember if it was the first time he had said my name, but it was the one time that burned into my memory so that I would even remember it years later when the memory of these terrible days and nights had long been buried in the depth of my mind. His voice was vivid, sympathetic and… hopeful. "I have told you that you would have to play a part in this. And I think _ḫedu-ana_ told you Bill would need someone at his side, some kind of insurance. Someone who loved him."

I managed a weak nod, trying to piece together the things he had just reminded me of with the things that had happened. I had already assumed earlier that I had must have missed my part, that I had failed in the ritual. Had I left the Tell too early? Had I been supposed to wait? Should I have known what to do? But the insistent voice of the En – his bald head was shining eerily in the bright starlight of the clear night, as I noticed vaguely. Another time this would have made me laugh – was giving me the smallest glimmer of hope. Maybe it was not too late. Maybe I could still contribute to the ritual, maybe Bill still had a chance. The thought gave me strength.

"What can I do?" I asked, knowing quite well that even if he would have asked me to do nothing but to wiggle my finger it would have hurt. I was willing to do anything, though.

"Do? Sookie, you have already done it. See, a Babylonian ritual takes place on several sacred scenes and it can take several days and nights. This one has three parts. In the first one you needed me to bring our matter to the divine attention of the seven great gods. You saw the great god Šamaš, the god of the sun and of justice yourself. He was the one who took the darkness out of Bill. During the second part, the great gods have withdrawn into their heavenly dwelling to decree his destiny. It was the part where Šamaš, the sun, was watching you all the time. Someone had to bring Bill from the ruins of Akkad here to the place of the third part. But the gods wanted to see a sacrifice."

What he told me made me happy and angry at the same time. I hadn't failed Bill, there was still a chance that he would be alright. But why hadn't they told me before? As though he was the mind reader here, he went on.

"The gods of the old times are like men in many ways of their behavior, but they are still gods. To gain their attention and to make them act in your favor they want to see something in return. Since the days of great worship are over for them and all the golden treasures of the old times are lost, they wish their divine hearts to be touched by humanity. Your tears and your sweat and your blood made them decide clemently. Now there is only one thing left to do."

One moment he was in front of me, the next he was standing in the middle of the small hill, lying down the lifeless Bill on the ground. I got up very slowly but he interfered with my intention to follow him by coming back again and carefully holding me by my arm.

This time there was no fire, no smoke, no ritual. There were no magical words in a long dead language. Just like that, the seven figures appeared again, looking more substantial and therefore even more surreal at the same time.

"They have decreed a good destiny. Now they are giving him back the gift of life." The En said, his voice no louder than the whisper of a breeze in a reed thicket. One by one the figures stepped forward and bowed down to Bill. I couldn't see what exactly they were doing. From where I was standing it looked a little like one after the other touched his forehead with a light kiss.

"Šamaš, the sun and the god of justice." He explained. "Since Bill had been banned from his sight throughout his life as a vampire, he played a special part in the ritual."

After him, another bearded figure stepped forward.

"Suen, the moon god. Then Enki, the lord of water and wisdom."

I watched as one figure after the other stepped forward to touch Bills face with their lips.

"Now Ištar, the godess of love, lust and war. Then Enlil, the powerful god of the earth and after him Anu the noble, old god of the sky."

The last one to step forward looked a little different from the others. He was wearing different clothes and looked much younger, wearing no beard.

"And finally the highest god of the Babylonian people. Mightiest, though youngest of them all. The king of the gods, the hero Marduk."

It was a surreal, miraculous and weird spectacle I beheld and often would I later wonder if the shades and looms of the gods had not been products of my imagination, fueled the first time by the smoke of the weeds the En had thrown into the fire, then by exhaustion and dehydration. It didn't help my fading memory that I remembered them vanish in an instant. The moment after the last figure had bowed down and touched Bill, they were gone. The strange atmosphere was gone with them and the night was silent, clear and starlit again. I kept staring at the point where Bill was lying.

"What – what now?" I asked the En. This time his smile was almost human, almost handsome.

"Well, go to him!"

He didn't need to say that twice. I forgot all my exhaustion in an instant, climbed on the hill as fast as I could, running to him until I landed hard on my knees directly besides him.

He was still unconscious, his eyes closed, his face pale. But something had happened that gripped my heart with a violent grasp, tightening my insides with a shock that resolved into pure delight as soon as I realized I was not imagining it. There it was, escaping his lightly pink, slightly parted lips, a slow, shallow but unmistakably noticeable breathing. I tried to hold back tears of joy with all my might, having cried enough already and not wanting to spoil this moment by doing something so stereotype. I touched his face, it was warm. I pressed my head to his chest, his heartbeat was slow but steady and it was the most beautiful thing I had ever heard. Moments passed before I could force myself to lift my head again. His face looked… different. If I had thought he was a handsome vampire, I was convinced now that he was a much more handsome man. The slight color in his cheeks became him and somehow his skin and features looked so much more _alive_. I looked around me to see if the En was still there. He was standing where I had left him, a strange expression on his face. I could not tell if it was happiness or despair or maybe a bit of envy.

"All you have to do to get home is say the words." He said when he noticed me looking at him. I had no idea what words he meant, but I did not care a bit at the moment. Reaching home would be a problem that I'd worry about later. There was no place for worries in my heart right now and there was only one thing I wanted to say to him.

"Thank You!" I shouted it out, relieving my heart of the troubles of these past days. "Thank you." And with that, the world vanished into white.


	9. The Awakening

**Note:** Sorry, it's been a while again this time, but y'all know how it is. Hope you enjoy this one and I'm looking very forward to hopefully many reviews!

**Chapter Nine:** The Awakening

The world vanished into white. For the second time in the past days, I must have lost all sense of space and time and I felt dizzy and disoriented when finally, after what might have been hours or seconds of feeling like floating in sheer, white nothingness, I felt hard ground under my legs and the weight of the unconscious Bill in my lap again. I opened my eyes and sucked in air in surprise, looking around me puzzled and shocked when what I saw turned out to be the sun flooded, comfy familiarity of my living room. It took me some seconds to wrap my head around that. Here I was sitting on the carpet of my own living room, when only moments ago (or were it moments ago?), I had knelt in the middle of the Iraqi desert having just witnessed the gods of a dead civilization bringing my dead boyfriend back to life. _Geez_. This En priest might have looked creepy and skinny, but he sure knew how to work some serious magic. After having realized that I had in fact been transported home by some kind of powerful but rather handy magic, all my attention focused again on Bill and my heart skipped a few beats, when I realized that he was still breathing, his still pale but now not superhumanly pale cheeks flushed with a hint of pink. After what we had been through, after what I had seen and felt these past days, all this felt strangely unreal.

Since Bill didn't give any sign that he would be waking up any time soon, I lay his head down carefully on the floor and slowly got up. My muscles were aching from the recent exertions and I staggered more than walked into the kitchen, pouring myself a large glass of cool water from a bottle out of the fridge and downed it in one go. I still wasn't feeling particularly hungry, though the tiring, exhausting effect of being without food for some time was getting more and more noticeable. I went back into the living room, watching my unconscious ex-vampire for a few moments then I grabbed the phone and punched in Sams number. He picked up after only a few rings.

"Sam, it's Sookie,,," he interrupted me before I could voice my request.

"Sookie, thank god. Where have you been all week? I was starting to get worried."

He sounded genuinely so, and though I had told him that I would have to spent some time away from work because of urgent vampire business, I had not told him where, why and for how long I was going away, so I understood his concern.

"It's kind of a long story. Would you come over to, uh, give me a hand with something? I'll tell you everything then." I knew it wasn't the nicest thing to do to call Sam of all men, but I really needed someone to help me get Bill upstairs and into bed. After all, I had no idea for how long he would be knocked out until he would come around eventually and I was in no physical state to heave him upstairs to one of the bedrooms alone. Besides, I was still groggy and shaky from the past experiences and I felt like I was not really able to handle the situation right. Was I supposed to call the ambulance or would Bill be fine on his own?

"I'll be right over."

Sam hung up and I relaxed a little. There was another reason why I had called Sam to come over, that I didn't quite want to admit to myself. Somehow I needed someone, someone real and living and familiar, someone who hadn't been part of this whole creepy, ancient ritual to confirm that this was the reality. That I was really, actually back in Bon Temps and that Bill, a living, breathing yet still unconscious version of him, was here with me, lying on the carpet of my living room with a heart beating steadily in his chest. Otherwise I was afraid I would wake every moment finding myself back in the desert, leaning against a rock, the dead body of Bill next to me in the dust with all hope and all happiness lost to me forever. I needed someone to confirm I wasn't dreaming.

While I waited for Sam, I drank another glass of water then sat on the floor next to Bill, stroking his soft, dark hair lightly. Hell, even if this _was_ just a dream, I was going to enjoy the sound of his breath and the beating of his heart as long as I was able to. Soon enough, I heard the sound of his car in the driveway then sound of a door being closed and opened again and before I had even gotten up to open the door for him, he was already halfway in, catching me in tight embrace before inspecting me closely.

"You look…. Tired." He said politely.

I laughed. "Come on, you can say it. I look like crap. You would too if you'd spent the last few days in the gleaming sun of the Iraqi desert, had crawled into a huge pile of old clay, had taken part in some kind of ritual, had cried your eyes out and then dragged your dead boyfriend through the desert for a whole day." I laughed hysterically, realizing that I had actually experienced every little thing of what I had just listed. Sam looked at me like I was crazy and I could have sworn I saw his hand twitch a few inches into the direction of my head to check if I had a fever, but he stopped dead in his movements suddenly and stared into the room behind me. His mouth fell open.

"Is that…. Bill?"

So he did see him! That was a start.

"But it's in the middle of the afternoon!" he seemed completely confused but stepped past me and entered the living room slowly, staring at Bill on the floor as though he might burst into flames every second. "Won't he…?"

"Burn? No. I don't think so. Please, Sam, go over to him and check if he has breath and a heartbeat?" Again Sam looked at he as though he thought I might have gone completely nuts but he did as I asked him. His eyes widened in shock.

"Sookie, what is going on here?"

About an hour later Bill was lying in the bed in my sunlit room upstairs. Sam had helped me move him there and put him to bed once I had briefly informed him of the events of the past days. He had asked me to tell him the story again and the second time I had spared him none of the details, neither the horrible nor the wonderful ones. I had asked him to pinch me please, and it had hurt like hell. I was not dreaming. This was actually happening.

Later it had taken some convincing on my part to get Sam to leave Bill and me alone for the rest of the day, because he seemed to have his mind set on the fact that I needed someone to look after me. The truth was that. how base the fact that I had taken advantage of Sam when I had needed him earlier had been, I desperately wanted to be alone with my beautiful, living Bill now that I knew this was all real. So I ushered Sam out of the house as soon as he had examined Bill closer and told me he thought he should be fine without a doctor and went to the bathroom, taking a quick shower all the while listening alertly if maybe I heard him waking up. I brought up some water and two glasses and nibbled on a cookie half heartedly, before I dressed in casual clothes (making sure they were not altogether baggy and unalluring – I didn't want the first thing he saw in his new human life to be a huge turn off) and slipped under the covers with him, pressing my ear to his chest, listening to the steady beat and the low breath and enjoying the unfamiliar warmth radiating off his body. The smell of his body, though essentially unchanged, was earthier, warmer and livelier now and soon I feel asleep, still not completely able to grasp the extent of happiness that filled my heart with overflowing joy and relief. Just before I dozed off, the thought came to me that, even if there would be trouble with the mind reading or anything else Bill had feared, there was nothing in the world that I wasn't willing to work out now that I finally had him for all the days and nights to come.

I slept safely and soundly for the rest of the day and all night in Bills arms, until I woke, gently and slowly just as the dawn was appearing over the horizon as a barley visible shimmer of silver light. For a moment I thought about getting up and making breakfast because after the rest I was really starting to feel my empty stomach and surely Bill would have to eat at some point too, but just as I was getting out of bed it happened.

With a sharp intake of breath, Bill sat up in the bed very suddenly, clutching his chest and staring around in confused terror. I shrieked in surprise, when a violent cough shook his body and I was by his side, holding his head and whispering to him in the fracture of a second.

"Sookie!" he exclaimed, as soon as the coughing had subsided. His voice sounded strained and thin.

"Bill, it's alright. Just calm down. It's alright. We made it. _You_ made it!" I couldn't think of anything else to say and I didn't need to as soon as realization dawned on Bills face. It twisted into an expression of pure, unbelieving joy as he pulled me into a close hug and buried his face in my neck. And it was just this moment, right then, when I felt hot tears on the bare skin of my neck that I realized how hard and frightening this whole thing must have been for him. What I had experienced must have been nothing compared to what he must have been trough. We would talk about it later, and he would tell me everything, but for now there was something more important I wished him to see.

"Bill." I said, and gently slipped out of his embrace, smiling happily as I watched him touch the clear, salty human tears on his cheeks and laugh out loud with a relieve I had never known in him. "Come on, I need you to see this."

I took his hand and pulled him from the bed, noticing how he moved a little stiffly, probably on account of the total lack of superhuman speed or strength. I pulled him until he followed me downstairs and out on the lawn in front of the house, where we stopped. Bill was breathing heavily.

"This…this is strange." He said. "I thought breathing would be difficult after so many years, but it's not. Just …unfamiliar." He pressed his hand to his chest and stared at me with joyous wonder in his bright eyes still as blue as the night we'd met.

"I had forgotten how fragile a human body is, though."

I laughed. "You will have to get used to it." The ways his face glowed with pleasure when I took his hand said "You're so warm." was the first time that the idea of reading his thoughts even came to my mind. I tried listening in on him and found… something strange. It wasn't the silent nothingness I had sensed before, but I found that I wasn't actually able to read his thoughts either. There was a warm, happy darkness in there, too thick for me to penetrate mentally and all I could pick up was the faint feeling that he was thinking about something that made him really happy.

As the sun rose over the treetops, I forgot about it. We just stood there in the golden morning light and I watched Bill, as his eyes followed the golden glimmer stretching over the sky and the earth with silent awe until he closed them and took in the feeling of the warmth on his skin. I felt him clutching my hand and we stood there for a long time, until the sun had fully risen in the sky and was shining down from a cloudless, clear summer sky, down on the man who hadn't seen the sun for a hundred and fifty years.


	10. The Living

**Note**: It's been around a week again, sorry for that. Another big, fat THANK YOU for the great reviews you wrote after my last update. It always makes me so happy to read them and you are all so very kind. This is supposed to be the last chapter, unless something hits me and I feel like doing a sequel (maybe with Anna returning, how knows?). I very much hope you enjoyed the story and will like the ending (though kinda kitchy…). Thanks again for all the great support!

**Chapter Ten**: The Living

The days passed away in a strange blur of happy feelings, tears of joy and warmth. I couldn't remember anything particular we had done, but I was so happy the whole time I still wasn't sure I believed what was going on. After Bills first sunrise, we had strolled over the graveyard to his home in the golden morning light slowly, not talking much just enjoying the moment. Bill had pointed out to me how strangely quiet he thought everything was, now that his hearing was back to human sensitivity and I had hardly been able to take my eyes from the unfamiliarly awed expression his face had shown at the sight of the delicate, moving and glimmering shadows the rustling leaves of the old trees on the graveyard had cast on the sunlit, grassy ground. On this first day, the slow walk over to his house had made him very tired. His body had not yet been used to working without whatever magic fueled the existence of a vampire, and so we had returned to my house soon.

I hadn't been able to hold back a laugh at the absolutely flabbergasted expression on Bills handsome features, flushed by the exercise and the clear, warm morning air, when his stomach had given the first, violent rumble. Hand on belly he had stared at me in shock.

"I think I'm hungry."

Only then had I remembered that he hadn't eaten in days and worst of all, he hadn't had anything to drink. He must have been nearly parched. As soon as I had planted a large glass of water in front of him he had put it away within seconds and then, after the first careful tasting, had devoured a pile of pancakes I had made for him with joy. It had given him a belly ache after so many decades of feeding on nothing but blood.

"It was well worth it." He had smiled afterwards, despite the pain and the moment was to surreally good to be true. Bill, the beautiful, mysterious, dangerous vampire, lounging on my couch in the broad sunlight of a Tuesday morning, smiling at me strangely changed. And his smile _had_ changed, that was clear to see. It was so much more open and happy than I had ever seen before I just couldn't get enough of it. But despite the obvious changes, I had noticed several reminders of his past as a vampire over the few days we had lived together now. The first and most important thing to me was the mind reading. Like the day he had woken from his Babylonian Rebirth, as I liked to call it in my head (though I never called it thus aloud because I thought it might sound kind of cheesy), I could definitely pick up _something_ from him, but it came in no way near hearing or knowing what he thought. Mostly it was some kind of vague notion of how he was feeling, or rather if he was thinking something positive, sad or angering, or anything of the kind. It was like where before his mind had been a blank spot, now there was a package of thoughts wrapped into dark that only the most general mood of his thoughts could penetrate while all the particulars remained rolled up in a blanket of warm darkness. After All, Anna as well as then En had warned us that Bill had been a vampire for so long that it was absolutely impossible to remove the darkness from his soul altogether, that a small piece of him, however tiny it might be, would always hold the dark creature he had been.

I had always assumed that the unreadable, stony silence Bill tended to hold most of the time had something to do with the eternal inner struggle of being a monster as well as a man, but three days after his Babylonian Rebirth, I found he hadn't changed a bit when it came to respects of chattiness. I often found him standing on the porch, face turned towards the sun just enjoying its warmth, without saying anything for long minutes. He did however smile more often, much more often. His body however, seemed to have maintained some of its vampire-characteristics. After a short while of getting used again to the limits and restrictions of the human body, Bill found that he was in better physical shape than most men as soon as he had decided to take up running in order to keep his supernaturally gorgeous waistline despite all my yummy favorite dishes I made him try. He seemed to have the average condition of a professional athlete and found it easy to lift heavy objects without much effort and to my utmost delight I soon found out that a spark of the old vampire-fire was left in other areas of physical performances as well.

It was sheer bliss to fall asleep next to Bill in the evening, feeling the warmth of his body against mine, and waking up in the same tangled, snuggly position again in the morning. Over the past few days we had made a habit of rising early enough to watch the sun set together and we had done so again this morning, the first day I would be expected back at work and therefore the first day my daily routine would sneak back into my life and end these magical days of peacefulness.

I had the late shift, so Bill and I sat down for an early dinner together before I would have to leave around five in the afternoon.

"This is delicious." The sight of my gorgeous ex-vampire sitting at my kitchen table with knife and fork in his hand, chewing contently on a piece of steak still bemused me in the best possible sense. So did his very gentlemanly manners. "Thank you for this wonderful meal."

I chewed on my own steak rather half-heartedly.

"Don't you think it's a little too raw?" I said after forcing myself to gulp down a half-cooked piece of meat that left a salty aftertaste of blood in my mouth.

"I think it's just right."

O.K., this would probably be another remnant of his days as a blood sucking, fierce creature of the night. I found it somehow endearing and slightly icky at the same time. His tries of behaving like a real modern, progressive man in a relationship of two equals were nothing short of adorable, however. If I was really honest with myself we hadn't been anywhere near that before, because although Bill had never been oppressive or overly magisterial, there had simply been things in our life together that I hadn't been able to deal with without him and he had reacted to those things with an exaggerated sense of protectiveness. Also there had been his vampire temper. Other things, things of everyday life, had never come up before. I thought about our delightfully altered, even improved, relationship while I watched him clear away the dishes in a comfortable silence. _Sookie and Bill 2.0_., I thought and had to grin.

"So, now that you are working at Merlottes again, I thought I might go out looking for some work as well." Bill said quietly, as he stood by the sink, washing the dishes in his neat and tidy fashion. That surprised me, but before I could say anything he continued.

"As you know I've …well, made some arrangements as soon as Anna had made it clear that there was a chance for me and when I still had the… opportunity. But you going to work while I stay at home just doesn't feel right."

Now that I thought of it I should probably have expected that. We had talked about financials already before the trip to Iraq and Bill had made it clear that money would never be a problem again for the rest of my life, that I could even quit my job if I wanted to. Where his money came from I didn't know, I was pretty sure I never wanted to and I had decided I would never ask. Nevertheless I should have known that Bill wouldn't be the type to stay home while I went off to work every day, maybe I had thought that he would take up some employment he could do from home.

"What kind of work?" I asked, hiding my surprise well.

"I don't know yet. I had quite some time to pick up one or the other skill over the decades. I'll just have a look in the paper. Maybe you could ask some friends in town." Was I imagining it or did it sound like he felt a little self-conscious about the matter.

"Sure." I smiled at him broadly. After Sam had seen Bill lying living and breathing on my living room floor the other day, the word of his unusual transformation had spread around town pretty quickly. On the first day I had received a regular flood of calls from nosy neighbors and snoopy acquaintances, most of whom I had fobbed with a lame story about a cure for Bills disease. The public had made people believe that vampires were only humans infected with a certain disease that made the show symptoms like an allergy to light or an un healthy liking for human blood but that there was nothing supernatural about them. I had told them that Bill had volunteered to test a vaccine that hadn't been tested before and that the scientist, who had developed it, wanted to keep the whole thing quiet, until they had watched Bill a little and made sure that the effects would last. So far, everybody had bought my story. Nobody would have felt comfortable with the creepy truth about an ancient vampire in the middle of the desert and a secret ritual in a dead language anyway. Besides Sam, only very few people knew the truth.

"Look at us," Bill suddenly said into the silence, more to the sink than to me. "How very domestic, me doing the dishes and talking about getting a job." He sounded somewhat embarrassed, which puzzled me and so I reached out mentally to feel the prevailing mood in his thoughts. It felt … _restrained_. As though he was not saying something he would like to.

"A very, very good thing, don't you think?" I said, leaning back in my chair and smiling at him reassuringly.

"You think?" he still hadn't turned away from the sink so I could only see his backside with the lean, muscular neck standing out from his white shirt, now that it had a nice and newly gained tan to it. "You don't miss anything from …before?" his voice was low and quiet.

"You mean being in mortal danger every five minutes? Oh boy, those were the days. With all the blood loss, and crazy people coming after me. I had new bruises to show off every week and another serial killer on my heels whenever we had gotten rid of the last." I sighed in exaggerated nostalgia. When Bill turned around he had his usual blank expression.

"You can't deny that the danger was a part of what drew you to me in the first place."

This was enough. I had expected to have a talk like this with him, but not this soon. A few paces and I was around his neck, hugging him tightly.

"Exactly. _Part_ of what _drew_ me to you _in the first place_. But I didn't fall in love with your fangs, or your freakish strength, or your super speed and certainly not with your strange habit of killing people who you thought might have hurt me or might want to hurt me. I fell in love with _you_. With the person Bill Compton. All the supernatural danger stuff was just something that I was willing to overlook to be with you. I cannot count all the times that I wished I could be with you the way I am now."

I kissed him, hoping my little speech was convincing enough. A wave of pure love and happiness radiating of his mind hit me and told me I must have done well.

"I love every minute of it. I love _you_."

"I love you too." He smiled one of his now not so rare smiles, just before slapping my butt with the dish towel he had picked up.

"Now off to work with you, woman. Someone has to bring the money in!"

I still grinned like an idiot a few minutes later, when I hurried down the stairs in my waitress outfit, grabbing the car keys and hurrying for the door. Bill was standing outside, face turned upwards to the sun, eyes closed and breathing deeply.

"See you later. Pick me up after work?"

"Of course."

As I pulled out of the driveway and stole on last glance on the tall, handsome man standing on my porch enjoying the sun, one of the few moments of realizations hit me. This was _real_. This was _happening_. Surely we were in a blissful state of infatuation, almost like two people that had just fallen in love or were newly wedded and surely there would be times ahead when not everything would be as smooth and shiny golden and easy and beautiful as it was now. But somehow I was sure, deep down in my heart that after all we had been through there would be nothing that we wouldn't be able to face. Hell, if Bill Compton wasn't the one for me, then no one was.

**END**


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